


Peaches

by AkazuIzuya



Category: Magi: The Labyrinth of Magic
Genre: A little bit of gore, Canon Divergence, Dark Past, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, I'm sorry it will get better, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Own Characters - Freeform, Past Rape/Non-con, Romance, Slow Build, Suicide Attempt, Trust Issues, family by choice, mentions of canibalism
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-08-28
Packaged: 2018-09-18 00:19:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 35,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9353615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AkazuIzuya/pseuds/AkazuIzuya
Summary: When Judar get's one last chance to get back on the good side of Al-Tharmen, he screws up big time.Going back means death to him, staying in Sindria probably too. And after that fucked up spell he was connected to their youngest Magi in a weirdly intimate way. He doesn't really have any way out left. Though, at this point in time death doesn't even sound that bad to his ears.Update 18.4.2017:I am currently putting down the lay-outs for the second partUpdate 28.8.2017:Second part is cancelled, but I'm currently finishing this story up to get a clean end.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo, yeah, I'm trying myself out with this x~x  
> I should do so much learning, but instead, I do this T^T  
> Well, Updates will be irregular, but I've got a ton of ideas for this, so at least I promise there will be updates!
> 
> Not Beta-ed ( I'm sorry)
> 
> Enjoy!  
> Read and Review appreciated!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> >   
>  **_"They wanted a monster._ **   
>  **_I decided to give them one."_ **   
>  _\- Anonymos_
>> 
>>  

Breaking through Yamuraiha's barrier was as easy as ever. After all, he was a Magi - the magic of a commoner wasn't worth mentioning against the things he had already accomplished. Or the things he could accomplish in the future. Grinning to himself, he stayed floating in the air, taking in the sight of Sindria below him. Colorful, lively, loud and full of happiness. Honestly, it made him sick to the stomach to see something like this. He had helped destroying this scene once, and he could no doubt do it a second time. 

With, or without the help of Al-Tharmen. He clicked his tongue, annoyed. Judar actually had a valid reason to be here at this time of the night. It was the only time he knew he had a chance to sneak up on the lenient king and grab the purple haired kings vessels. Only now, after the recent celebration when he knew the king was intoxicated enough either not to notice him at all, or think he'd just be a bad dream if he accidentally notice the black Magi. Judar hoped the stupid king would simply stay asleep throughout the whole ordeal. He wasn't very keen to be ripped apart by the high king in a fit of rage - however right-out it may be. 

 

He stayed afloat in the air where he was, staying unusually silent, his wand in a strong grip. He couldn't fail this. Not this time. He slowly breathed in the warm, salty air of the island, forcing himself to relax just enough not to freak out any minute, before blowing out the air just as slowly, controlling his rapid beating heart at least a bit. He was smart. He was strong. He knew Sinbad good enough, and he had a good intuition. There was nothing that could go wrong this time. Ja'far was passed out over his papers due to lack of sleep, the Fanalis and the bird-girl were away from the island for the time being. The magician woman was knocked out by a spell Judar had carefully woven over hours. That gal wouldn't wake up sometime soon. The white haired swordsman was also passed out from too much to drink. The Immchuk was taking care of a sick child, courtesy of Judar, and currently snoring away from exhaustion. Of course, that still left the damn lizard-man to deal with, but the Magi had carefully kept an eye on that one, and he was just making his round away from the drunken kings quarters. 

Judar mentally slapped himself, the grin fading from his features. Everything has been set into motion, now he just needed to get down there, into the stupid kings room, take the metal vessels, and slip back out. Easy as that. He shot a glance back up at the night sky, hoping that this wouldn't be the last time he would see the sight of the endless black and white. It was now or never. Nothing in between, and the fallen Magi swallowed the growing dread. He slightly thought that fear had somehow become a really annoying companion of his as of lately, and he pressed his lips into a thin line. When he moved himself lower and carefully down towards the castle, and the room the high king would rest in, slight metallic rustling chimed around his arms and feet, as well as his throat. It was almost unnoticeable, implying that the Magi was already used to the shackles he hid beneath a heavy cloak. Still, it made him flinch and he hoped the lizard didn't catch the noise. 

He attentively listened as he floated lower and lower, only stopping when he was hovering in front of the windowsill of the room he was going to enter. For a second he was grateful that it was warm in this island, and the windows were huge and without glasses - so unlike Kou. His naked feet touched the floor of the room without a sound. It was big and lavish and luxurious, the ceiling high, the walls and the floor covered with carpets, and ornaments were everywhere. There was a sofa, some divans, huge pillows and blankets in one corner of the room, and a huge shelf filled with scrolls and papers next to that. He supposed the stupid king didn't work in this room, as there was no desk anywhere in sight. There was, however, a ridiculous huge bed, with four pillars and silken cloth hanging down, near the window. The nightly breeze entering through it made the light fabric flutter, and Judar could see another mass of pillows on the bed. He saw a hint of skin and remembered that he shouldn't look too closely as the stupid king wasn't only stupid, but also a pervert. He had heard more than enough stories from the old hag going by the name Kougyoku. 

 

Still, he couldn't help himself and stepped closer. The carped on the floor was muffling the chains noise, but it reminded him of the reason he was here. A last chance. A last chance to save his sorry ass. And probably the last chance to see Sinbad. For a while, the fallen Magi did nothing more than to stare at the lowly snoring human king in front of him, sprawled out on his back, the blankets barely hiding his crotch, sleeping soundly and without a worry. Judar knew painfully well what this feeling in his chest was, but he ignored it like he always did and tried to bury it deep into himself. What a stupid thing feelings were. They were the very reason he was in this predicatement to start with. Because it was foolish, and he had still acted on it. 

 

" Ja'far! Don't! That's my....... rum.... stupid advisor......" the kings shout had Judar almost given a heart attack, but apparently he was only sleep talking. He had stirred a bit, only to turn around and completely fall back into sleep again. The Magi had to suppress a chuckle, smiling a bit at the sight, before turning around and slowly walking over to the pile of metal vessels. They hadn't been hard to spot upon arrival for him, as they weren't even hidden. Nobody in this country would even get the idea to steal from their beloved king. And his enemies usually knew better than to even try. Even the black haired male knew that this was a shitty excuse of a plan. 

 

He reached out for the djinn vessels, but restrained himself just in time not to touch them directly. He knew he would just instantly summon the djinns, and that wouldn't be smart. Instead he used his wand to make them float in the air, none of them touching the other to keep them from making any noise. He felt himself getting weaker, and he realized he had drawn out his stay for too long. He wasn't in any actual condition to freely use his magic, he bitterly confessed in his mind. 

Of course the rukh loved him, but he could only use so much his body could take. That was fine when he was healthy and all, but lately..... that hadn't quite been the case. So he was left with dealing this whole shit with his own magoi, and let's be honest here: He was really bad with that. He had never needed to use his own magoi so he never trained it, unlike Sinbad. The realization had damned upon him, in the recent days, that this high and mighty attitude of his got him into all kinds of trouble. 

 

He hadn't even noticed he had laid the pieces back down from where he had picked them up. An exasperated sigh left his chapped lips as he suppressed a groan, and he made them float once more, just as the door to the room opened, and Judar startled, breaking the levitation spell. The kings ornaments fell down to the ground heavily, and the intruder stared at the door, meeting the sight of a sleepy Aladdin. For a long second, everything seemed to freeze, before two things happened at the same time: Aladdin woke up completely, and Judar went to bolt out of the window. He didn't come far, though, and without any warning, a ball of fire hit his back. 

The black Magi hissed, falling out of the window, and in his panic forgetting easily what he came for. Well, now it was too late. Judar barely kept himself from hitting the ground harshly, but he heard the young fourth Magi wake up the king with loud and panicked words. Well, that was a stupid way to fuck up, he growled lowly, pulling the cloak tighter around himself and then looked up, just in time to watch the blue haired teen jump out of the room. He caught a glimpse of purple hair poking out, but he had no time to make sure, as he was already attacked once more.

 

" Judar! What are you doing here!?" the fourth Magi's voice was enraged, and there wasn't a trace of the sleepiness the priest had seen just seconds before. His Borg activated just in time, thankfully, but he still bolted away, though he kept his movements on the ground at first. He wasn't very fast he knew, but Aladdins aim was bad enough for him to be able to get out of most small fireballs unscathed. " Well what do you _think_ I was trying, sneaking into the kings chamber at night? Are you stupid?" he snarled, and with a flick of his wand, the black rukh chirped around him, while trying to help as he conjured up water out of the air. 

The amount was about a bucket only, not his greatest spell, but it would suffice for now he thought grim, as he froze it up. With another flick of his wrist the ice shard was sent the white Magi's way, and the smaller one evaded it gracefully. Judar almost ran into a guard, and he cursed under his breath. Looking ahead, he noticed that more men were coming his way, and not only that - there was already the much dreaded advisor he hated so much. With grinding teeth he threw himself into the air with his levitation spell, but it lacked all his usual grace.  
" Catch him!" " Don't let the intruder get away!" the shouts now filled the corridors and the grounds outside the palace, and Judar wanted nothing more than to get the hell away from where he was. 

 

Another curse left him as he was stopped midair, when the younger Magi stood in his way. Judar stayed where he was, fidgeting slightly below his cloak but doing his best to keep it from being too visible. It was enough that the other stupid magician had already exposed him. " Move aside kid, I just wanna leave. You've already ruined my fun."  
" I can't do that, Judar!" Aladdin answered in dark honesty, his staff in front of him, but not yet throwing another heat spell at the intruder. " Why are you here?"  
" It's not important anymore. It failed. Let me go. I won't be coming back here."  
" You're lying."  
" I'm not, promised. Just let me out of here and everything will be alright. It's not the first time I pranked the stupid king! Come ooon~" he cooed, doing his best to seem like always. In an effort to make it seem like one of his normal visits, Judar tilted his head back and made the hood fall from his hair. He showed the smaller Magi his usual cocky grin, hoping it didn't lack his usual confidence. Chuckling a bit, he noticed how he was being scrutinized by the others gaze. 

 

" Don't let him escape!" another voice from the ground shouted up, and Judar saw how the king was at least halfway dressed now and out there himself. He was wearing all his metal vessels, and something inside the dark Magi broke as he saw the rage and the hatred in those amber eyes. He didn't need to be down there to notice it. He could feel the resentment even high above the other male.  
" Right!" Aladdin shouted back, and then there was the rise in rukh around them. Judars head snapped back towards the smaller one, and he tried at least to fight back. He wasn't really doing a god job, though. More often than not, his spells weren't fast enough, shot with too less force behind them, or the ice dispersed before it had a chance to hurt the target. Snarling, Judar went back to using his lightning magic in an effort to at least stand - or float- his ground. But it was taking a toll on him and he was steadily growing more tired. 

 

" Argh just let me leave you fucking toddler!" he shouted after a few more exchanged attacks, and he took all of his wits together, thinking about a solution to this situation. He could try the thing he had done on Yamuraiha. Though, he would have just seconds this time, instead of hours, and next to no power left anymore. He didn't know if it was even worth the try, but right now he knew he didn't have any chance.  
So he ground his teeth and raised his arm, surprising Aladdin as his shackles and chains came into sight, and strung together a ton of formulas that were complex enough even when he wasn't this tired. The younger Magi also raised his stuff, preparing a spell of his own. Judars Magoi fluttered out for a split second, and he had to restart the spell all over again, closing his eyes as he gathered his strength together, trying to ignore the cold sweat over his body and the trembling of his fingers.

Judars obvious weakness startled Aladdin and he fucked up his spell, letting go of it. The blue haired teens eyes widened, filled with dread. He had no idea what he had just shot - it wasn't finished, nothing remotely what he had wanted it to become, and the ball of weirdly behaving magic sucked in the rukh around it, a screech shattering the night. Judar, too out of it and to surprised to complete the spell, threw what he had conjured up, hoping that his Borg would protect him from whatever Aladdin had thrown his way. 

 

However, the magic didn't hit him. The two spells met in the middle between their conjurers, split up and then Judars magic was sucked in by Aladdins, and the weird ball grew, turning an ominous purple with ugly dark red and black stripes that smudged the elsewise beautiful color. But then the Rukh around Judar disappeared, and the rukh surrounding Aladdin did too, and mixed up with the spell, before it exploded into light, a shrill ringing that went through both Magi's minds, and everything was drenched in light. 

 

It took Judar only a second to recognize the feeling of the spell. He knew it, but not in this wide scale. Not with this weird taste it left behind in him. But when his memories resurfaced, he screamed. He couldn't hold himself floating anymore, and neither did the smaller Magi. Judar never noticed he fell. He never noticed he hit the concrete, he never noticed how he screamed his lungs hoarse, and how he cried and sobbed. 

How he begged for dear life that it would stop - that he would be good. A good child, he would listen, that they just shouldn't _touch_ him anymore. He didn't notice he froze half the palace while he screamed and sobbed, that he clutched at his hair and ripped out a fist full of it. That he scratched at his neck, so harshly he ripped of his skin at parts, that he broke his nails when he tried to get rid of the choker - the golden one, as well as the one that bound his wrists to his neck. 

It took him about half an hour to stop screaming, but that was only when his voice gave out and it wasn't more than a whisper. When it finally stopped, he thought he couldn't bear it anymore. That he didn't care anymore, and he would get back to Al-Tharmen of his own free will and get himself killed. Or that he would ask Sinbad or Ja'far to kill him, they would probably be delighted.

But when he tried to pick himself up again, it only worsened the situation so much more. His cheek scrubbed over the dirty ground and the ice he had almost frozen himself in, and he was trembling. He didn't even get up on his elbows, as it all repeated itself inside his head once more and he slumped back down, vomiting and retching, trying to somehow survive it a second time. He couldn't scream anymore, even when he desperately tried, nothing came out but hoarse breathing, keening and weeping noises. 

" Make it stop... " he chocked, trying to get himself probed up on his arms, and he searched for the other Magi, seeing him in the same agony as himself. It was only then, he noticed, that he also saw what Aladdin had gone through. It wasn't anything like what Judar had to suffer through, and with a weird certainly, the black Magi knew that Aladdin was seeing the same memories. Judars memories. Years of physical, mental, and sexual abuse. Years Judar had sealed away himself with magic, had tried to forget.

" Don't look... !" he sobbed, fear taking over, as he grabbed his wand stronger. " Don't you dare look... at this side of me..!" the voice cracked, and Judar threw a weak magic between them, dissolving whatever spell had them in their grip. Both of the Magi slumped down, Judar in despair, his rukh in uproar and his magoi and strength was close to nothing. He knew he was close to the end. Aladdin was too absent minded to do anything special, and the Sindrian people rushed up to the small Magi, shouting in worry. 

 

He wasn't going to do anything anymore, but his haunted gaze went up as he heard steps on the ice he accidentally created. The steps were only slow, tentative, as if not to needlessly startle the fallen man. Sinbad came into view only seconds later, confusion written over his face, and something more, Judar couldn't really wrap his head around it. He was to frightened, to panicked and too tired to notice much more than the presence of another person.  
"... Judar?" at the soft voice, he flinched heavily, gaze shooting to the high king, then away, and then back again.

" Stay away...!" he whispered hushed, and Sinbad did. He stopped in his tracks, to worried about this whole situation. He had never seen the Kou priest like this...  
With no control over his emotions, lying in a puddle of blood and vomit, and he was trembling, tears still strolling down pale cheeks. He only now noticed that he was even paler than usual, it seemed sickly. And the chains - Sinbad frowned, kneeling down where he was to get more eyelevel to the enemy. Though, he could by no means say that Judar was a threat right now. 

" Don't...!" Judar hissed as he noticed exactly that thought. " Don't look at me in pity!" he croaked with his hoarse throat. " This is all... That stupid midget's fault!" he spat, clenching his hands into fists and trying to stop the trembling. Trying to ban the panic and fear from his quiet voice - even replacing it with hatred would be fine. " This all.. wouldn't have happened.... They wouldn't have... " he choked on his words, on the try to push his resentment towards the teen magician. Failing utterly, and another sob rose up. He didn't raise his head again. He couldn't look at the high king, not now - and never again in the future. 

" Judar..." again, the Magi flinched at the voice. God, he must look so pathetic right now.... probably not even worth killing, since Sinbad found him so pitiable. The black haired male bit his lower lip until it bled, and the pain grounded him. It was a quick swipe with his wand as he called forth sharp ice pillars in the general direction the high king had been crouching down. He heard the surprised gasp, but he didn't take the time to test if he actually hit him or not. It hadn't been his intention anyways.  
Biting down another sob, Judar called upon his last bit's of magoi, and pushed himself through a portal, leaving the scene without looking back, and without noticing Sinbads worried call of his name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, yeah, I'm trying myself out with this x~x  
> I should do so much learning, but instead, I do this T^T  
> Well, Updates will be irregular, but I've got a ton of ideas for this, so at least I promise there will be updates!
> 
> Not Beta-ed ( I'm sorry)
> 
> Enjoy!  
> Read and Review appreciated!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> >   
>  _**" Sometimes, memories are the worst kind of torture"** \- Anonymos_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!
> 
> Back with the second chapter! Lately, I've been hording ideas for this story, and ugh, I got so many ><  
> Well, anyways, I am currently searching for a Beta-reader. If someone has the time and interesst, please notify me!
> 
> Aside from that: Please Enjoy! Read & Comment is appreciated ♥

It was nothing more than a weak whimper he let out as he somehow started to feel something again. Though, just moments later, he wished he wouldn't feel anything at all. What had woke him up were nightmares and pain, the digging feeling of hunger in his stomach, as well as the distant smell of dried up blood and fire. Screams still rung in his ears from his nightmare, and he pressed his eyes close hard, trying to forget the memories of that night. And, if he could, try forget everything else as well. 

Another whimper left him, as he pried his eyes open slowly. They felt like they were glued together. With cement or something like this at least, and even though the light entering his vision was really low, it stung and hurt, making him flinch and close them again. He waited for a moment, but nothing happened. Wherever he was, he was either alone, or the one accompanying him didn't notice him waking up.

But what.... what if he was in a dungeon? What if he didn't make it far enough, and Sinbad's men had caught him? Taken him in and now he was to rot in their cells? Panic made its way up his throat and he struggled, prying his eyes open once more. He blinked against the light, and forced them to stay open. His fingers twitched as he tried to get the blood flowing again. Slowly making a fist, and reopening his hands, repeating the motion a few more times, he stared at the cells ceiling - no wait. The ceiling was made of wood, and it had cracks through more than one of the planks, letting in slightly orange tinged light and the sound of waves. Struggling, but succeeding in turning his head, he first looked to his left and then to his right, taking in his surroundings. It was only a small cot, nothing worth mentioning. And he wasn't alone. 

His heart made a frightful jump, before he calmed down again - there was someone, yes, but the woman was asleep. By her looks she couldn't do much anyways - her big swelled stomach spoke for itself. She was obviously pregnant, probably about to give birth in the next weeks or days, as far as Judar would guess. He was lying on a rough carpet, covered with a thin blanket. The black wizard pressed his eyes shut again as he pushed himself up on his elbows and forced himself upright into a sitting position. 

Even with his eyes closed, it felt like stars were dancing before his vision, and every fibre of his body simply hurt. It was a low, numbing kind of pain. The kind he was already used to due to... well, let's call them former incidents. Only that his lower back and ... the rest didn't sting as much. He suppressed a violent shudder, opening his eyes again, as if the action could chase away the images flashing his mind. It didn't really help, but with open eyes and light around him, it was easier to remind himself, that those days were over. Because he wouldn't go back to them, even if it meant death.

 

A terrified screech jolted him out of his bitter thoughts, and the male raised his head and turned it to the door. The woman was also startled awake, but he didn't pay her much attention. He just listened. He could hear voices, and he caught some words. It was only when he identified one of the voices as a higher one that he realized, there was a child involved.  
The woman slapped her hands over her mouth, trembling terrified. " M-mirtha...! Oh god, Mirtha...!" she whispered. Judar looked at her, taking in her sight. She seemed rather healthy, but with that huge stomach there wasn't much she could do. Apparently, though, she wanted just that, as she heaved herself up and went to the door - well, actually, Judar noticed, it wasn't much of a door. It was a hole in the wall covered by a carpet. 

Judar blinked, watching her leave, before standing up himself. The woman seemed extremely worried. It was quite possible she knew the troubled child. Maybe it was her younger sister - or brother. Maybe even her own child, who knew. He didn't get far though, as he stumbled because of the shackles and chains on his ankles, and he grimaced, just barely not face planting the rough floor. It was ridiculous how weak he was. It was a wonder he was alive at all, considering how much magoi he used. After that... that incident, he had just fled the scene. 

He didn't think about anything, but to simply disappear. A white rukh bird flying into his vision made him frown. A white rukh..? Why was something like this anywhere near him? The fallen Magi. Unless he collected them for magic, they usually stayed away from him. It was weird, but he didn't really have the chance to continue his train of thought, as another scream and shout was heard. Someone fell to the floor.

 

To be honest, Judar really didn't know what to do. He had no obligation to help the woman, much less the child. Sure, they may have saved his sorry ass, but he never asked them to do that. They should have left him for dead. He was a stranger. Didn't they know that it was stupid to take in strangers? At least, the Magi himself wouldn't have helped anyone. He sighed, straining himself to straighten his back and pull back his shoulders. He touched at his clothes, feeling his wand safely near his skin. He may be in pretty bad condition, but that didn't mean he wouldn't put up a fight if it came down to it. 

He pulled the cloak closer, trying to cover as much of his body as possible, before slowly taking step by step out of the little cot and into the sun. He had to raise his arm to shield his still sensible eyes from the strong and bright rays. Blinking up, bright blue sky greeted his eyes. For a short moment he remembered that he had wanted to see the sky again, at night with all the stars. But then he was interrupted once more, and this time it got him annoyed.

 

What the fuck was their problem!? His head felt fuzzy enough, he didn't need others constantly ripping him out of his thoughts! He groaned in annoyance, taking his next steps, seeming much more steady than he was. He wasn't even surprised at what he found: the pregnant woman was lying on the floor, terrified. There were three men, one of them held a young girl in his grip. She was around the age of 6 years and she struggled, but she was crying.

He didn't do anything at the beginning, besides taking in the scene in front of his eyes. There was no sympathy for the woman, nor for the child. Nor had he any reason to help them out, like he already mentally noted. It wasn't until his gaze met that of the childs, and he saw a kind of relief in them.

" Mister...!" she sobbed. It wasn't the kind voice that asked him to help her; it was the kind that told him she was relieved that he was awake and had regained consciousness. But why...? It clicked. Then, apparently, she was with the woman. And she had been worried about him. About a stranger! Judar couldn't remember the last time someone had been worried for him, if someone had been worried at all. The girls addressing made the men notice him too, but the Magi had once more sunken into his thoughts. It was only when his Borg activated, that his gaze came back to the present. He stopped glaring at the girl, instead turning to the stunned man that had tried to hit him. Judar tilted his head slightly, making the chains at his collar rattle. 

" That's useless" he simply snorted, not bothering to give another look at the man. He took a step forward, but didn't expect to be hit in his sides and sent flying in the same moment. Coughing heavily and not being able to stop his crash landing, he met the floor with a broken and heavy sound but without a cry or protest. He groaned slightly, but before he could get up again, he was grabbed by his long ponytail and picked up. Another groan left his chapped lips and he stared at the bulky man that held him with his feet dangling above the ground. Judar met angry brown eyes and a displeased frown that he instantly mimicked. “What is up with this-“ the guy started, but Judar interrupted him,  
“ Let the girl go.” He demanded and for a moment his rough words and strained voice stopped the men. It was enough time though, for the girl to free herself and escape to the pregnant woman on tue floor. 

“You little shit…!” one of the other man said, coming over also. Seconds after, there was a fist flying right into his face, and the Magi was secretly very grateful that he was still held up by his hair. Receiving that punch would have sent him flying once more, and it was enough humiliation he was already enduring.  
" Mister!!!" the girls shrieking rung in his ears, but it also guided him back. He remembered they weren't holding the kid anymore, and he snickered, stunning the man once more. Even more, though, as he raised his hands. One grabbed the dickheads arm that held him up, the other one went into his pants.

" Hey, this guy is in chains." one of them said, staring at them.  
" 'This guy' can't kill you, solely because of them. You should thank that circumstance." Judar said, made a quick movement, and then the man holding him let go, bend over and made an ugly, gurgling sound. Some blood dripped to the ground, and he stared horrified at the Magi, then at his stomach.

Without much thinking, Judar had stabbed him with his wand, and was now freezing him from that very spot on. The ice made low crackling sounds as it spread over his torso, shoulders and thighs, and had the thug finally completely in its grasp. Judar pulled back his wand, giving the man gone ice statue a push and threw him over. The arm broke off, but aside from that, nothing happened.

" Ah, Hakuryuu No.2." Judar snorted, before his gaze went to the other two man. " So, who of you want's to play~, hm? That was ice, so I guess, lightning would be the next, right?" he smiled, tilting his head. He watched them pale, but instead of feeling the usual satisfaction, he felt nothing. " You're insane, dude! You're a magician!?"

" Don't compare me with those lowlife beings." Judar spat out, pointing at the remaining two males with the red jewelled tip of his wand. They flinched and took a step back. The young male felt nauseous, and he wanted this to be over with, so he could lie down or something like that. So he decided, a warning demonstration should be enough as he raised his arm with his weapon and gathered water, staring the evil doers down out of red ringed eyes. For the purpose of frightening them further, he tilted his head back a little, so the light reflected in his eyes would let him look like a mad lunatic. He knew he would look like this - Kougyoku and Hakuryuu had often called him that. 

It took only seconds until the guys turned tail and ran away. Judar waited for good measure, but simply let the spell slip up after that and the water dispersed as his arm fell to his sides. It was suddenly very silent, he thought, and he raised his hand once more, staring at it.  
He had helped the child. He had helped that woman. The man contained in the ice wasn't dead just yet, and he let two others get away alive. He was... he felt weird. Sick to his stomach, but at the same time oddly satisfied. He didn't kill. He didn't kill anyone this time.  
Did that make him into a bad child...? 

A shudder went through him, and then he felt a hand grapping his cloak and slightly tugging. Suddenly jolting out of his memories and thoughts, he stared to his left, were the girl was looking up at him.  
" Mister! Thank you for saving me! But you shouldn't be up yet! We should go back in - mom has already gone back!"  
" I shouldn't stay with you." he simply said. Obviously, she either hadn't heard him or didn't care, because she pulled him with her. And, sad as it may be, Judar had to confess he didn't have the strength left to fight the small child. 

 

" Why isn't it crying...!" the woman sobbed. The girl, whose name was apparently Mirtha, held a newborn boy in her thin arms. The baby was shivering, but alive. From what he could see, the problem was the second child. The woman had carried twins, and the second one was a little girl. The small body didn't move. It barely took a breath. If he couldn't see the small rukh fluttering around it, Judar would have said that thing was dead.  
" Mom...? Is my sister alright?" Mirtha asked, staring in hope at her mother. Judar cringed as he watched the scene. He stood up from where he had sat cross legged, and went the very few steps over to the small family.

" Of course she isn't, dumbster." he sneered, and as they both tilted their heads to stare up at him in horror, he felt awfully terrible. Nonetheless, he stared down at them.  
" But why...? She should have been healthy..!" the mother cried, hugging the almost lifeless body to her chest. Judar stayed silent, but felt the strong gaze of the young girl on him. He frowned as he turned to face her. " What' up with that gaze, pipsqueak?" he grunted.  
" You... you can save my sister, right?" she whispered, and her mother suddenly got silent.  
" What? Why the heck should I?" the Magi grimaced, raising his hand to pick his ear. He closed his eyes, so he wouldn't see the hope in her gaze. His movement made the chains rattle their song, and he was reminded that he had nowhere left to go. 

A thought, better called a wisp of a thought, crossed his mind: Maybe, if he helped here, he could... create a place to stay. Until he would recover at least. Or, until Sinbad would find and kill him.  
He straightened his back a bit more, staring at the half dead newborn, before staring at the mother. " You will regret this one day, old hag." he said, before his grip went to the child. He almost had to rip the body out of her hold, and as he held the small weight in one of his hands, he felt weird. There was a live in his hands... and he wasn't about to kill it, but to save it. The fallen magician grimaced once again, as he watched the rest of her magoi flicker out. There was only one way to save this small one, and he was sure if the woman ever found out the truth, she would be sure to hate him.

Even though, he didn't have the time to find a better way. He cursed lowly as he grabbed his wand, and came up with a formula he didn't even knew he had known about. Probably one of those he got when he absorbed parts of the black rukh from Magnoshtadt. His wand started emitting purple light, as did the childs body just a second after that. Judars head began to spin, and it felt like it would split as a terrible pain went through his body. And then the newborn he held started to cry, and the Magi felt the world tilt.  
Then everything was black.

 

_" Why didn't you kill him?" the voice of his caretaker asked him. He raised his gaze and tilted his head back. Judar hated that he was so small. He was already 6 years old, dammit! Why did adults always have to look down on him? And now even his teacher!_  
_He frowned, before using his newly learned levitation spell, to bring himself eye-level to the man. " Why should I? He was in my way, but he didn't do anything to deserve death." he answered grumpy. The man in front of him, wearing the typical organizations clothes, stared at him, before letting out a disappointed sigh. " Just why do you have to be so useless, Judar?"_  
_The young boy flinched, and a pang of guilt and scare went through him. " W-why..? Is it.. no good? Am I really no good..?" he asked with a small voice. " I... I'm black. Isn't that good?" he tilted his head, searching for the answers in his teachers face. The man though kept on staring him down, before a powerful magic erupted, making the floating young Magi crash into the ground, where he left a small crater. The boy screamed in pain and coughed, before looking up terrified._  
_" I think we have to teach you some more about who you are supposed to be, Magi. Let's go."_  
_"... N-no... no, please... Not the ritual..." he whispered, but the man simply waved his staff and levitated the child on the ground, and took him away._  
_Judar was scared. No more. He just wished they would stop._  
_It was all the fault of his behaviour..! He just... if he had to, then..._  
_" I'll kill the man... please! I promise I'll change! Please don't bring me there!"_  
_" That's still no good, Judar. We well have to teach you from zero. Come on, after this, you'll have lots of fun out in the world!"_

 

" His fever is really high... I'm worried." Ireena said, watching as her daughter, Mirtha changed the wet towel on the magicians forehead. He was breathing heavy and squirming, covered in cold sweat. But no matter what they tried, he wouldn't wake up. The woman stared at the shackles he was wearing. On his feet, connecting them with a chain. And on his wrists. Then there was that one on his throat, and from there, another chain connected his hands and the chain on his wrists. He looked like a prisoner, no matter how she tried to think he wasn't. But whoever he was, he had saved her daughter... and her newborn also. 

Ireena looked towards her two newborn children in their cradle. The boy, whose name she decided would be Jelez, was sleeping quietly. But the girl was getting weaker, just like the magician. She was worried about the young man. But she couldn't really do anything, besides waiting and hoping he would pull through. She couldn't call anyone who might be able to help. She had the slight feeling, that he wasn't as welcome in this country as all the other refugees their beloved king took in over time.  
She sighed.  
" Please get better soon, Mister..." Mirtha murmured.

 

Apparently, he wasn't really getting better anytime soon. Even as he regained consciousness, the fever never really went away. Though, it couldn't render him powerless enough for Mirtha or Ireena to pin him down and make him rest.  
" No way! I won't go down from a stupid fever!" he insisted, though both females could see he was bluffing. He was literally screaming that he needed the help of someone who could heal, but he refused to leave the cot, nor did he take to well to the others leaving. It was obvious he was scared about being found. Ireena never left the small cot after that for almost a whole month. She never saw him eating anything. And the only times he slept was when he pushed himself too far and lost consciousness. He would get some hours of sleep when her daughter Mirtha would lay down next to him. He always seemed to have nightmares, but they wouldn't be so bad if the girl was cuddling up to him. Though, she had to run for dear life from him at the first signs of him waking up.

The two times she had been caught by him, he had terribly hit her, She still had the bruises. Only when water or food was needed, Mirtha would leave them behind and get it. Ireena still remembered the beginning of the month when she had first left - she had come back empty handed and bruised, with wounds and she was crying and apologizing, because some thugs had found her.  
The mother was ripped out of her thoughts as the males clothes and chains rustled, indicating he had stood up. Her newborn daughter grimaced, and she was about to start crying, as Judar walked over to the cradle and picked her up. The child instantly went quiet again. Ireena smiled slightly. 

No matter who that man was, he was their saviour, and she trusted him. " She still needs a name." the woman said, but Judar only gave her a worn out gaze, before holding the baby closer to his body, draping his cloak so nobody would see the child.  
" It's your brat. Think up one by yourself." he answered.  
" I want you to name her. You saved both my daughters, and she's fixated on you. I'll wait, until you are ready."  
" Stupid." he sighed, before turning around and leaving the cot, together with the baby. The woman stayed behind in the small room. It suddenly felt really broad, without the bad tempered stranger and her cheerful daughter. She sighed, cradling Jelez close to her chest as she waited for them to come back. She knew the magician whose name she still didn't know went to pick up Mirtha on her way back and keep her out of trouble.  
She lost her smile though, as she started to think about the future.

The man was getting weaker every day... He probably didn't have much time left.

These thoughts crossed her mind repeatedly lately. It has already been a month. She had a bad feeling...


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > _**" There is no greater agony,  
>  than bearing an untold story."**  
>  \- Maya Angelou _

Aladdin blinked lowly as if leaving a daze, as the door fell shut behind his friend that had left the room. Oh. He didn't notice that Alibaba had visited him... again. He knew he should pull himself together, but it wasn't easy. He was trying. He really was! But for the last two weeks, he had just been trying... trying to process what he had seen, and what had happened that time their spells had crashed. Something had changed. Something important.

The young Magis hand went to his hair that was currently unbound and fell down behind him on the bed. He picked a certain thick strand and pulled it before his eyes, to stare at it. White. A part of his hair had turned white, a few days after the incident. He wasn't sure what that meant, but he had panicked at first after noticing it. Now he had simply accepted it. Yamuraiha was already doing her best to find out how to reverse it, but Aladdin knew she would fail. Knew that the genius magician wouldn't be able to do anything.

Because you can only reverse a spell or alter it, if you know what it was made from, and why, and how. And Aladdin hadn't told her anything about what he had found out. About... the connection.  
It had taken him a week to understand it himself. At first he had been too distracted by the nightmares that came with Judars memories. Then he had forced himself to calm down. But from time to time, he would feel something without a reason, and it was like a whisper, as the rukh chattered about the black Magi. The black rukh mixed in with his. 

 

Aladdin didn't know what that meant, but he was connected to Judar. When he understood that, he had tried to listen into their shared mind, but it wasn't easy. He guessed, Judar had also noticed it, and tried to block him off. There were only rare opportunities when he could reach the other, and those where when the older one was asleep and dreaming. Which, to Aladdins dismay, happened almost never. 

The blue haired boy sighed, and he looked at the small table next to his bed. There were plates with food. Alibaba had probably brought them. He didn't feel like eating at all, but he knew he was worrying the rest enough, seeing as he hadn't left his room for the past two weeks. Reluctantly his hand went to the food and he ate a bit until he was full, then forced himself to eat at least a bit more, so they couldn't chide him for eating to less. It still wasn't much, though. Not soon after, he placed the plates away again, and closed his eyes again, trying to concentrate. Trying to feel the other Magi. The growing feeling of uneasiness and fear in his chest didn't belong to himself, so they had to be the sign that Judar had fallen asleep.  
" This time... for sure.." Aladdin whispered to himself, and threw himself into the bloody darkness that would await him.

 

_Judar was floating above a town that was on flames. He was about Aladdins current age, with his usual clothes and hairdo. He wielded a slightly different wand, but what was most disturbing to the white Magi, was his expression. It was something in between delight, and disgust. It was like he was forcing himself to have fun while looking at this picture._  
_" Just... why am I doing this exactly..?" the black haired wizard whispered, brushing over his eyes harshly before tears could escape. He stared down after this, coincidentally meeting the eyes of a townsman that looked up._  
_" You... I curse you! I CURSE YOU, WIZARD!!! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!" the hoarse voice reached even up towards them. " I HATE THIS FATE! I REFUSE THIS! THIS WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN! I WON'T ACCEPT THIS!!"_  
_A flock of black rukh erupted from the man and flew upwards in a spiralling movement towards Judar. The boy seemed surprised, maybe a bit afraid._  
_"... Black rukh..?"_

_" Splendid!" Judar flinched, as did Aladdin. The voice belonged to his instructor, his teacher, and one of the man Judar feared the most from his past. He had appeared right behind the Magi in the air, and placed a hand on a small shoulder. " Wonderful, Magi! That's a good work today. So, how do you feel?"_  
Aladdin felt the panic rising in his chest, and he could see the reaction of the older Magi. The fear, the distress, but also the wish to be praised more.  
_" I-I.... feel... good. I feel good..." he answered, cautiously. The man scrutinized Judar for a moment and Judar visible stiffened, as if expecting his teacher would do something. Well, he did, but only raising his hand more, and almost gently stroking the younger ones head, before his hand wandered below his chin and pushed it up, so Judar would look him in the eyes._  
_"... You always were a pretty bad liar, Judar-chan. Let's go back. The rest and I will teach you once more, to have fun with things like this."_  
_" No...!"_  
_" If you would just behave already, we wouldn't need to do this that often. Oh well. At least you have gotten decently good at those kind of things."_

_" ...please... no more..!"_

_**Please stop... Don't look, Aladdin. Please don't** _

The last thoughts were the current Judars, and with that the younger Magi was pushed out. Aladdin gasped for air as he realized he was back in his body, and that Judar had noticed him this time. It wasn't his imagination! They _really_ were connected in a way!  
So that meant... the reason he was feeling this horrible the last two weeks, whenever he felt like crying or like he was about to vomit, the helplessness, the rage, the fear - that was all Judars? Aladdin paled. The older one was still in Sindria, he knew. Feeling incredibly weak he forced himself to leave his bed, and walk towards the window. He was resting in one of the rooms in the outer circle of the palace, so he had a great view over the kingdom below the palace. 

Somewhere out there was Judar - weak, afraid, and confused. It was weird how it was so painful for Aladdin. He never hated the older one, though he also had held a kind of resentment all the time. It had vanished, though. All that was left now, was worry and sympathy. His small hands grabbed the blank windowsill until his knuckles turned white, and he finally made a decision. He would help the fallen male, wherever that path would lead him.  
But for that, he needed Alibabas and Morgianas help first.

 

_______________

 

Ja'far was surprised at the blonde's question.  
" Why do you want to know that, Alibaba-kun?" he tilted his head. Where had this question come from? Well, it wasn't like Ja'far hadn't thought about that lately, but still it had caught him off guard that the former prince of Balbbad came to him with such a question.  
" I've... been thinking." the blonde said, and Ja'fars gaze landed on the others fists for a second, before he decided he would listen and later on answer.

" We have been through a lot in the recent years, good things have happened to us, just as much as the bad things. Fate has thrown stones at us, but somehow we managed to pull through. All of us had something to cling to." the younger one said, gaze steady on the silver haired counsellors eyes. " Morgiana had her memories of her friend, then Aladdin and me, and even Hakuryuu. I had memories of my mother, and Cassim... of my father, and then the guidance of Aladdin and Morgiana at my side. Aladdin as well, he had Ugo-kun and us, and he learned much through Yamuraiha and meeting Sphintus and Titus. Sinbad has you all. Everyone of us had times when we needed a hand, but all of us had one to turn to in one way or another."

" That's right. I guess we all were lucky in that aspect." the silver haired man nodded. He had a feeling where Alibaba was heading with his words, and he didn't know if he knew a honest answer.  
" That's why... when Aladdin and Judar fought, I.... I was worried for Aladdin... But now, I'm... I'm also worried about Judar." the blonde confessed, lowering his gaze.  
Ja'fars eyes widened for a second, before he was calm again, though his thoughts were spinning. The earnest tone didn't make him doubt the blonde, but it was still hard to stomach such words. Judar never had been nice to any of them, only brought trouble and destruction. For Alibaba, too. 

" Does that mean you have forgiven him? He was a part of the cause for the terrible disaster of Balbbads fall, Alibaba."  
" I know!" the blonde hissed back and sent him a short glare, before turning his head to the side.  
" I know this better than anyone. But I don't think he had a chance to say no at that time." Alibaba bit his lip in frustration.  
" I think, Aladdin saw Judars memories. I know how it feels to have someone see your past. When Cassims and my rukh clashed, it was the same. I felt defenceless and hurt, even though we were friends and I trusted him. So for Judar, who had his memories read by someone that is his enemy... I feel bad. But, you know...? I had lot's of good memories also. That made me less unstable. But he was... Judar was... like he didn't even have one good thing he could cling to. Like he had deliberately tried to hide this from everyone. And Aladdin has been staring into space for the last two and a half weeks...." Alibaba sighed, raking a hand through his hair. 

" He spoke to me yesterday..." he said in a low voice.  
" He did? That's good..!" Ja'far felt relief at Alibabas words, but at the same time, a lump in his throat.  
" He said... he said, he would be going to get Judar out of the darkness..."  
The former assassin blinked, processing those words. It stayed silent between them, and finally, Ja'far turned around and went to his desk, to sit down on his chair, staring blankly ahead.  
" That means, he is going to his side, even if that means abandoning Sindria..?" he carefully asked. The silence that answered him was enough. " So, you want to know what I think about Judar, and the recent incident, because you want to know if I or the others might pose a threat to your friend." he hummed, and noticed the other male stiffen, but giving a firm nod.  
It was brave to ask him this question - Ja'far undoubtedly was one of the people here who hated the fallen Magi the most. Nonetheless, even he could show compassion, and he had held doubts over the evil nature for years - not to mention Sinbad, that goodhearted king. He sighed.  
" I will tell you what I think. You need to guess for yourself, whether I will be a threat to you or Aladdin... or Judar, for that matter."

 

_______________________________

 

" I don't hate him."  
Morgiana waited, until the older Fanalis continued. Though she knew he wasn't a man of many words, he was usually pretty vocal towards her at least.  
" It's just that I can't forgive him."  
" I know, me neither. He hurt so many people.... But I also did that in the past, on the orders of my former owner." she said lowly, pain in her gaze as she remembered. She had once said the exact same words to Hakuryuu - back when they had fought against Aum Madaura. And after listening to Aladdin, she suspected Judar was just like that - someone who had been controlled.

And she knew, once you were suddenly free, you couldn't get rid of bad habits and your way of thinking very fast, and not without help.  
" I think, Judar is someone who doesn't know how to tell right from wrong. I think, no one has ever taught him. I feel like, all he ever did was because he needed to protect himself. Everyone has done something bad once at least, to protect themselves. That's human nature. So I believe, if he just has someone to guide him... then maybe he can change." The young woman stated her thoughts, although troubled on how to find and place her words. 

That was really what she thought, and though she couldn't forgive him, she also didn't hate him.  
Masrur stayed silent, before he simply turned around and started to walk away.  
" You should stick to your believes. See this through, Morgiana." he said, surprising her, but walking on. Morgiana bowed down, even though he never turned back to see that. 

 

When she went back to the room Aladdin was resting in, she wasn't surprised to find Alibaba there already. She smiled at the two, before reporting to her blue haired friend. Her gaze was fixed on the white strand in his hair.  
Alibaba also reported what the others had said, and Aladdin nodded, but fell into a thoughtful silence after that. It was nothing new to his friends, though it still pained them to see the young Magi like this. Morgiana looked at the blonde, and they exchanged gazes, before nodding, a determination taking over their worry.  
If Aladdin was going to take care of Judar, they would try to help out.  
But in the end, everything came down to Judar.... and to Sinbad. He was still the king of this country and Judar had done things that could never be forgiven. Especially from the high king of the seven seas.  
All that was left now, was to find Judar and haul his ass in. That couldn't be so hard now, could it? After all, he was always causing trouble, and with his distinct appearance, he was sure to stick out.

 

Well, it turned out that, no, it wasn't easy to find the Magi. Wherever they searched, whoever they asked, nobody seemed to know. Once or twice Alibaba got the feeling that people knew Judar, but simply wouldn't spill the beans. Even when Morgiana assured them that, yes, they were from the palace, but no, they didn't want to harm the man.  
No one gave them an answer, and so their mood got bad increasingly fast.  
" Well, on the other hand, not finding him even though you know he is here, means he hasn't stirred up any trouble." Drakon snorted as he saw the three coming back once more from a fruitless attempt to find the fallen Magi. A full month had passed.  
Aladdin flinched because he hadn't noticed the generals presence, but when he looked up there wasn't the least of resentment or disdain in those reptile eyes. 

" Uncle Drakon..." he hummed. The green scaled male nodded his head.  
" I had time to think things through. I'm not ready yet to forgive him, but I am willing to reevaluate my view of him. If he can change, I am sure that his best chance is to keep to king Sinbad. If not, his best chance might be to flee. He has already caused too much pain to our king." the tall man laid out his thoughts. The three young friends gave a firm nod, appreciating the open words. 

" Well, anyways, unless you find him, I don't think any of us have any idea what to think." another voice chimed up, a little lazy and a little annoyed.  
" Teacher!" Alibaba looked up, smiling at the white haired swordsman.  
" Yo! Up for a sparring match, Alibaba~?" he grinned, but before the blonde former prince could give his consent, a heavy rumbling went through the air and the earth shook.  
" What was that!?" Alibaba shouted, noticing how the blue haired Magis gaze had went up towards the sky.

" The barrier has been breached!" he explained, and Sharrkan and Drakon cursed.  
" I swear, if that's-" Sharrkan started, but Aladdin interrupted him.  
" It's not Judar! Judar can't possibly do anything remotely this powerful at the moment! I can barely feel him anymore... " he confessed, biting his lip, gazing at the barrier, whilst the guards started to run around. Alarm was called, and the magi shuddered.  
" This is... we need to hurry!" he shouted, and took off into the sky.  
" Hey - wait! " ignoring the swordmans shout, Morgiana used her Household Vessels power to get herself into the air, grabbing Alibabas hand to take him along.  
" Sorry teacher!" the blonde called, but then he was already far off - too far away to even hear Sharrkans loud complaining.

" What are you doing!? Let's go after them!" it was Sinbads voice that made the white haired male spin around, just barely catching the sight of his king speeding ahead next to him, Drakon following swiflty.  
" Eh? Eeeehhh?! Wait!" he called, before finally starting to rum himself. But even then, Masrur who only now took after them had sped ahead in less than a 10 seconds and once more, he cursed loudly.  
" You traitors! All of you!" 

 

He almost couldn't believe his eyes when he finally entered the scene. And from the way Sinbad looked, his king couldn't either.  
" What is the Al-Tharmen doing here?!" the purple haired king of Sindria growled in a low voice. And really, he was right. It was the organization that had entered their kingdom. A wide circle had formed, most civilians had gone into hiding.  
" King Sinbad, what honour!" one of the masked magicians spoke.  
" Yeah, what an honour alright!" It was easy to notice how the king was just barely not going ahead and ripping them apart. But being the first-class singularity, of cause he had already noticed the girl the evil magicians were holding hostage. And his gaze also clung to the cloaked figure that was in the wide space, across from the mages with his head tilted down and covered from Sinbads sight.  
Sinbad forced himself to remain as calm as possible.

Ordering himself to think of something, he noticed the childs gaze - afraid, but determined and strong. Her eyes rested on the cloaked figure.  
" I'm ok, Mister! Don't worry." she sniffled, forcing a smile on her lips. Sinbad could see the tears, but that made the young girl even more brave.  
" Shut up, Mirtha." the figure replied, and Sinbad felt his gut sink - it really was Judar, like he had guessed. He was about to say something, but as soon as he opened his mouth, the man holding the child hostage pulled her back once more and pressed the wand stronger against her throat.  
" Please, honoured king, stay out of this. We are merely here to get back our empires Magi~" the one who spoke first said in a smooth voice. 

 

" Oh really now. Who would have guessed that." Judars voice was void of all emotion. He didn't seem to care about anything in the world, though Sinbad wouldn't bet on that. He couldn't see the Magis face, so he couldn't say whether he was bluffing or not.  
" Well, what should we have done now, high priest? You went ahead and failed your last mission, and on top of that you refuse to come back. Empress Gyokouen is really troubled by your behaviour. Now, great high priest - come back with us, so we will let the girl life.... the girl, and that child in your arms."

Even now, Judar didn't flinch, but Sinbad could swear he noticed the younger one stiffen.  
And did the enemy just mention a child in the Magis arms?  
Wait, in the first place, taking a hostage against Judar should be pointless! The Magi didn't care about normal people's lives!  
" So, what do you say, honoured high priest, Judar-sama?"

 

" Why does the Al-Tharmen want him back?" it was Aladdin who raised his voice now, taking a step forth so he was seen. His gaze went to Judar for a second, but the black haired Magi just clicked his tongue and turned his head away slightly.  
Aladdin guessed that reaction was good enough for him, and so he looked towards the organizations mages once more, making sure that Judar and Sinbad were always in the corner of his eyes. 

" The great high priest belongs to us. We raised him, and he is to lead our empire further with his guidance~" the man answered, his voice so smooth that it made the generals cringe. That smile was just disturbing, and none of them could blame Judar as they heard the gag noises he made to show his disgust.

Though, obviously, that wasn't his brightest idea, as they roughly pulled Mirthas head back to expose her throat. That, apparently, at least shut Judar up. For half a minute, nothing happened, before Judar groaned, deeply annoyed.  
" Geez, fine! I'll at least lend you my ear. I'm a great person, so I'll listen to you little maggots. Make it short, I still need my beauty sleep." he snapped.  
Sinbad almost didn't trust his ears and he clenched his hands to fists. Judar really was evil to the depths of his soul - not even the life of the girl was save before that wretched Magi!  
The Al-Tharmen mages snorted, making Judar stiffen.  
" Yeah... sure you do, high priest~" they snickered. Sinbad was confused what they meant with their obvious mocking tone, but he wouldn't dare ask. He knew if he tried something, the child would suffer. So his eyes went back to Judar - it came down to the fallen man, to save the girl. And Sinbad wasn't happy about that.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > **_" It's ok to be scared._ **   
>  **_Being scared means you're about to do something_ **   
>  **_really, really, really brave."_ **   
>  _\- Anonymos_   
> 

" Mister! You don't need to tag along every time!" Mirtha pouted, walking backward with her hand behind her back. She was playfully glowering up at the black haired male following her with her baby sister on his arms, carefully hidden away from the eyes of people under the cloak he was wearing.  
" Every time I don't, you end up either losing what you bought, or beaten to a pulp. I don't care about the first, but you nag and cry and complain when you're hurt, and that's a pain in the ass." Judar retorted very unfriendly. 

Mirtha grumped, puffing out her cheeks. " Yeah right..." she murmured and turned around, only to get the strangers hand hit the back of her head. She yelped and covered her head with her hands, desperately trying not to cry at the harsh treatment. Even though she knew that the magician was a rather violent guy, she kind of still angered him on a regular base. She sniffed quietly, flinching when he spoke up this time.  
" If you cry, I'll hit you one more time."  
" You're cruel, mister!" she whined, drawing a snort from him. He still followed after her, though, and Mirtha hid the smile on her lips. 

He may try to act like a bad guy, but she knew he wasn't. Bad guys wouldn't tag along after her to rescue her from other bad guys. And bad guys wouldn't have saved her baby sister! But the mister did, and so he wasn't evil. Easy as that. She grinned broadly at those thoughts - well, until the mage hit her once more and she instead whined. A small, weak but high sound came from under his cloak, and she turned halfway around to him to watch as he adjusted the baby on his arms. 

Since the day her sister was born, the baby was fixated on the stranger. She didn't understand why, and his explanation of rukh and magoi and whatnot had only confused her. She guessed it had something to do with him saving the newborns life. That would have to do. But Mirtha was only 6 years old, it was ok that she didn't understand so much. She noticed red ringed eyes staring down at her and blinked up at the man, noticing he had pulled on his hood.

" Are you still struggling with the sun, mister?" she asked, tilting her head as she strolled through the market stalls. He grumbled as he tagged along.  
" I don't understand how the people of Sindria can stand these sunrays. Has your skin lost its sense of pain?" he grumped, scowling at the bright atmosphere around them. It was lively and the people seemed happy. Carefree even. Nobody was in panic, and it was strange. Normally, people feared him, but here? As long as he hid himself, they treated him like everyone else.

" Hey! Hey mister! Look at these fruits!" the childs voice made him turn his head and away from a stall that sold medicine, to look at what she was pointing at. Noticing she had found his favourite fruits, he made a humming noise.  
" Well well, peaches. How rare. I didn't know Sindria was importing them." he said, picking one of them up.  
" Do you like them?" Mirtha asked, tilting her head. 

For a moment, Judar hesitated, before he placed the fruit back to the rest. " I used to eat lots of them back in the old days. But now not anymore. Come on, get the damn food you need and let's get back." he sighed. She probably would have bought some of the fruits if he had told her that it was more or less the only thing he ever ate, but he didn't want that. He didn't need a 6-year old buying him food!  
Turning around and slowly strolling down the lively street, he relaxed a bit. Nobody stared. 

To think he never had the chance to create a proper kingdom - like he would have wanted, and now, being in the middle of such a kingdom... He felt a little bummed.  
For years, Judar had tried to become Sindrias, to become **Sinbads** Magi, but every time he said something along those lines he was turned down in a crushing way. Now, he didn't even have Hakuryuu at his side. Not even Kouen, or the old hag could help him out of his situation.  
It was a bitter irony that he was spending his last days in the kingdom of Sindria, after he had claimed he wanted to destroy it and kill the king - after being turned down so many times, Judar might have held some kind of resentment towards the stupid king and uttered some childish threats.

He sighed soundless and turned away, but was startled as the earth shook and screams sounded as the barrier broke in some places. Judar cursed and made his way over to Mirtha, who turned in his direction with fear in her eyes. He wasn't fast enough, though. Judar had never been physically strong or fast - weaker than Hakuei, and slower than Kougyoku. But it never bothered him as long as he still had his magic - this time though, he cursed his inexistent abilities.

A white thunder clashed down, and a fearfully strong gust of wind whipped the people and the stalls away, opening a circle of free space in the market place.  
" Mirtha!" he shouted, just as the girl was grabbed by two pairs of hands.  
Judar stopped in his tracks, stiffening before he forced himself to relax his muscles. If he even just gave a hint that he cared about the child, they wouldn't hesitate to kill her. His only chance to get her out of this situation, was to be indifferent.

And for once, Judar really despised the fact that he was a fallen human. With his black rukh, it wasn't actually hard to find him, considering all of Sindrias inhabitants where white and pure.  
And of course, it didn't take long until Sinbad and his men where there. Judar growled, barely audible. 

 

" What is the Al-Tharmen doing here!?" the purple haired king of Sindria growled in a low voice. And really, he was right. It was the organization that had entered their kingdom. Judar didn't turn to look at him, though.  
" King Sinbad, what honour!" one of the masked magicians spoke.  
" Yeah, what an honour alright!" It was easy to notice how the king was just barely not going ahead and ripping them apart. But being the first-class singularity, of cause he had already noticed the girl the evil magicians were holding hostage. And his gaze also clung to the cloaked figure that was in the wide space, across from the mages with his head tilted down and covered from Sinbads sight.  
Judar knew that the high king was forcing himself to stay calm in the face of this situation, much the same way Judar was trying to seem unfazed. 

He himself wasn't as calm as he probably appeared. And even though he knew, sooner or later - probably sooner, rather than later - his disguise would fall, somewhere in the back of his mind, he wished things could have just continued this way for a little bit longer. It has only been a month. With a little bit of luck, and a few more hours of rest, he may have gone on like this for another week maybe.

" I'm ok, Mister! Don't worry." Mirtha sniffled, forcing a smile on her lips. Judar bit his lip in anger. She was reassuring him, even though the one really in trouble was her, not him. Well, maybe it was him, but she should really learn to value her life more.  
" Shut up, Mirtha." he replied, and Judar hoped Sinbad would for once just stay shut. But of course, no. He was about to say something, but as soon as he opened his mouth, the man holding the child hostage pulled her back once more and pressed the wand stronger against her throat.  
" Please, honoured king, stay out of this. We are merely here to get back our empires Magi~" the one who spoke first said in a smooth voice. 

 

" Oh really now. Who would have guessed that." Judars voice was void of all emotion. He didn't seem to care about anything in the world, though in reality he wished, more than anybody else here, to rip their heads of their necks. Preferably as bloody as possible. But since he still held his head lowered, it wasn't obvious he was bluffing.  
And to be honest, Judar was bluffing harder than he ever had, right now.  
" Well, what should we have done now, high priest? You went ahead and failed your last mission, and on top of that you refuse to come back. Empress Gyokouen is really troubled by your behaviour. Now, great high priest - come back with us, so we will let the girl life.... the girl, and that child in your arms."

Even now, Judar didn't flinch, but he stiffened slightly. How...? He didn't know how they even noticed the baby! The child had the same black rukh as him, and it was hidden by his cloak for god's sake! In the first place, taking a hostage against Judar should be pointless! The Magi didn't care about normal people's lives! He never had. But looking back at the past month - his stay with Mirtha, with Ireena and the newborn, Jelez, as well as the girl in his arms... with Aladdin at the back of his mind, even now pondering at his thoughts and trying to reassure him, to comfort him...  
He knew, he would do anything to save those lives.  
" So, what do you say, honoured high priest, Judar-sama?"

 

" Why does the Al-Tharmen want him back?" it was Aladdin who raised his voice now, taking a step forth so he was seen, drawing some attention on himself. His gaze went to Judar for a second, but the black haired Magi just clicked his tongue and turned his head away slightly. Judar hated how there was his presence, so bright and gentle, caring and worried, and how there was no resentment at all.  
Judar deserved all the hatred thrown at him, he knew. It made him feel much more vulnerable than the last days, to know the younger Magi was concerned for him. He closed his eyes for a moment, lowering the wall around his thoughts just a tiny bit, and letting Alma Torrans prince into his mind.

Aladdin guessed that reaction was good enough for him, and so he looked towards the organizations mages once more, making sure that Judar and Sinbad were always in the corner of his eyes. Who knew what they would actually do if it seemed they would make a wrong move. Aladdin could feel himself calm a little as he let the small trail of the black wizards thoughts through. It wasn't much, but enough to let Aladdin get a better grasp on the situation, and their enemy. 

" The great high priest belongs to us. We raised him, and he is to lead our empire further with his guidance~" the man answered, his voice so smooth that it made the generals cringe. That smile was just disturbing, and none of them could blame Judar as they heard the gag noises he made to show his disgust.

Though, obviously, that wasn't his brightest idea, as they roughly pulled the girls head back to expose her throat. That, apparently, at least shut Judar up. For half a minute, nothing happened, before Judar groaned, deeply annoyed.  
" Geez, fine! I'll at least lend you my ear. I'm a great person, so I'll listen to you little maggots. Make it short, I still need my beauty sleep." he snapped.  
Sinbad almost didn't trust his ears and he clenched his hands to fists. Judar really was evil to the depths of his soul - not even the life of the girl was save before that wretched Magi!  
The Al-Tharmen mages snorted, making Judar stiffen.  
" Yeah... sure you do, high priest~" they snickered. 

The black Magi grimaced, but didn't comment further. Yeah, beauty sleep - what the hell? He wished he could slap himself, but that wouldn't really help so he didn't do it. He needed more than sleep, to be anything remotely comparable to a recognizable force to deal with. As it was right now, he couldn't do much. 

" Mirtha!! Oh no, Mirtha!" the screech of a shocked female stirred up the silence, and most of the generals turned to look at the woman. As if on cue, Aladdin stopped her and shook his head.  
" Please wait here, we will solve this problem." he said in a low, but kind voice. The youngest Magi felt relief wash over him, noticing that it was Judars, and turned back around. Judar didn't look different, but Aladdin felt him even more stressed now. Well he could understand, obviously the girl, Mirtha, and maybe the child on his arms also, belonged to this woman. 

The rattling of chains sounded like a prayer to the devil, as Judar shifted his arms and the cloak fell open just the tiniest bit. With a wave of his wand and a short word, something floated into the air in front of the mage, and was carefully carried over to the generals. It stayed silent while the Sindrian people took in the form of a newborn baby in the air surprised. 

" My child...!" the woman sobbed, but as she reached for it, Aladdin went ahead and almost snatched it out of the air. The mother was about to cry out for help, as the blue haired Magi built up his Borg just in time to barely block a lightning that stroke down on them. Screams of terror erupted all around them

" Oh? I could have sworn I hit it... Oh well, whatever~" a rather slender form floated down between the Al-Tharmen magicians slowly. The Sindrian people, the generals as well as their king, watched in wonder as a woman gently touched the floor and tilted her head, smiling with closed eyes. The woman had black hair, bound back in the traditional Kou style, frilly, expensive clothes befitting her high rank, and of course - a terrifying presence.  
" Judar-chan~" she hummed.

It was only now, that the high priest visible flinched back. Her voice, her presence, everything about her. At one point in time he might have liked her, but that was long ago in the past. Back when he had not understood anything yet.  
" To have you here personally, Gyokouen..." he said, trying to act like he didn't actually care. But he couldn't ignore the panic rising in his chest, and the scream that clung in his throat, but he wouldn't let out. He stopped trying to block Aladdin out, and instead welcomed the calming force that was the younger Magi, sweeping over his being. 

It helped him a bit, but he would never confess that.  
" Yes~ you see, I was wondering where you were? After my children left with you, they just up and disappeared! How cruel of them, don't you think?" her face betrayed her words, as she was still smiling the whole time. Judar snorted.  
" I think their rebellion was long overdue." he said. " I mean, it's not exactly easy to have you as their mother. I can't even imagine how they felt when they found out." he vaguely added, not exactly saying what he hinted at. His heart skipped a beat as she was unmoving, just for the split part of a second. Just enough for him to notice his words had her unnerved the slightest bit. 

" Well, you're right, it's probably only a phase. It's sad when the children leave the herd... but I guess you wouldn't know, my sweet Judar-chan. After all, we made sure of..." she trailed of, hiding a grin behind her sleeve as it got obvious that she had the Magi at his most vulnerable: pride.  
" Or, maybe you do know? I see, you played the game of family in the last month~" she giggled, her head turning around to look at Mirtha.  
Fear went through the black haired male, and he made the smallest of attempts to move forward - foolish, as it was exactly what she wanted. A chuckle escaped her and she looked at him, warm and loving... and Judar hated her. No, _despised_ her everything. That bitch was the reason for everything ever happening to him, and he clenched his hands to fists, before he relaxed his hands and his arms simply hung limb next to his sides. 

There wasn't exactly anything he could do now. Not now, that she was here and had a hostage. Sinbad wouldn't dare do anything to endanger Mirthas live, nor would his generals. Aladdin and his two friends wouldn't either. Judars thoughts wandered to the newborn. Ireenas child. He had yet to name her, on behalf of her wish. He should have done it sooner, he realized - he probably wouldn't have another chance.  
Breathing out slowly, Judar resigned himself to his fate. He had guessed that his end would come soon, but he had at least held the childish, stupid hope that he had just exaggerated. Of course, Judar was wrong on the rarest occasions, and this wasn't an exception it seemed. He hadn't been called Oracle for naught, after all.

" KYAAA!" the girls scream yanked him out of his thoughts and his head flew up to stare at the Al-Tharmen, and seeing they had shot a wave of lightning at the defenceless human child. He ground his teeth, noticing Sinbad shivering and gazed at the purple haired king.

" Please, king Sinbad. Stay out of this. This is a matter between the Kou Empress and the Kou Oracle." one of the mages said. Sinbad flinched and stared at Judar.  
" Now, where did we trail of?" Gyokouen tilted her head in a cute manner, but it just made Judar grimace. " Oh yeah, I remember! Family, right? I was really said, you know? You left after that... little incident. I confess I may have gone too far back then, but you should forgive me, Judar-chan..~"  
He bit his tongue as her smile got fanatic, and did his best to not throw insults at her.

" Come on, if you are willing to become a good boy once more, I can overlook this~ After all, we wouldn't want something to happen in this Kingdome, or it's people~ Knowing how precious this place is to you."  
" Of all the reasons you had to name, you take the one most unbelievable. Seriously, do you even hear yourself, old hag?" he growled. So what if he liked Sindria? So what if he liked the people living here, and the king most of all? Was it _that wrong_? He was a Magi! He was supposed to create a proper kingdom, together with a king he chose! But he never had the chance - thanks to that witch.

But that didn't meant he was going down without putting up at least a little bit of resistance. He smiled, than grinned, and lastly even chuckled. It bordered heavily to his normal nasty snickers, it shook his body and made his chains rattle.  
" I declared I would destroy this kingdom and kill the king, myself. Without your back up, you know~ What makes you think I will do _anything_ for this kingdom? After all, I don't see any reason to fight for a king who denied me over the course of years." at first he had been grinning, but at the end it had faded. 

There was the hurt and pain again - the resentment caused by Sinbads continuous cold brush-offs. He clenched his teeth, pushing the anger down. Now wasn't quite the right time to be angry at the stupid king.  
" Oh yes, I remember you trying to become his Magi. You'd throw your temper tantrums even worse whenever that happened. Well, better for us, after all it made you into the black wizard you now are!" she chuckled. " And even better, you chose Hakuryuu as a King Vessel after that! Even though I don't quite know where that boy is at the moment... I know that he will come back, as long as we have you. So, come, Judar-chan~ Come back to us... your _family_." she cooed. Gently, lovingly, **disgustingly.**

Unnoticed by the Magi, though, Sinbad had gone rigid. Had he heard right? That Judar had fallen into depravity was partly his fault? And what was that about Judar becoming his Magi? All the times Judar had, well, offered himself, it was supposed to be only for the purpose of mocking him! Judar never had meant anything he had said, not even once! He had caused a disaster back in Parthevia, was the reason Hinahoho's wife was dead, and so much more. Judar would never like a kingdom like Sindria - it was the complete opposite of him. Didn't the Magi himself stress his words every time, that it was _war_ he liked most, and nothing else? 

But what... just, what if? What **if**? What if Judar had meant his offer? What if he actually liked Sindria? What if, part of the destruction and Judars twisted character, was Sinbads fault?  
What if, all this time, Judars strange behaviour, his offers, his random visits, all had been a silent cry for help? Help to get out of the hell that was obviously his life?  
Just what....

**Just what had Sinbad done to Judar, over all those years...?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > __**"A villian is just a victim  
>  whose story hasn't been told" **  
> - _Chris Colfer_  
> 

" Let the girl go. Then I'll be.... obedient. " his voice was low, but it made Sinbads eyes widen nonetheless. Did Judar just... agree? Agree, as in: save the girls life, at the cost of his own? The king didn't believe his eyes until he looked towards the empress. But her delightful face, the sure sign of victory, spoke for itself. Sinbad had actually heard right. Judar had said those words.

" Wonderful! Now we reached some ground!" Gyokouens gentle voice made him scowl, and his eyes went to his friends and generals. He saw the same incredulous shock in them he felt himself. When his eyes reached the blonde prince, however, he was a little surprised. Alibaba wasn't simply worried, neither was he shocked. Instead, Sinbad could almost feel the hatred radiate off the young noble, even from this distance. Aladdin and Morgiana were the same. 

" First of all, take off that cloak - you look ridiculous with that thing on" the empress sighed. The high kings gaze went back to Judar, and he would have sworn he saw the magi stiffen. Then, albeit slowly, Judar raised his hands. Again, the chains rattle resonated in the otherwise silent air. It wasn't more than one tug, and the brown rug fluttered to the floor. What he revealed made Sinbad speechless, and some of the bystanders gasp in horror.

Judar was thin. He had always been more lean than most others, but right now if seemed like he wasn't more than skin and bones, definitely underweight, his rips showing through clearly. He was even paler than usual, and his once carefully braided hair was open and falling down his back and over his shoulders, touching the ground and collecting dust and filth, knotted and probably beyond help. It seemed bleak, and a little singed. Sinbad couldn't remember any encounter with the dark wizard when there had even been one single hair out of line, so this already spoke of itself. Also, there was a broad strand of white hair in between the black, just like Aladdin had a wide white strand in his blue hair.

However, his clothes were equally far from his usual appearance: the white chunnari that fell around his shoulders was dirty and had more than just a few brown-reddish splotches all over it. It wasn't hard to tell that it was dried blood. The black, golden-trimmed choli that showed off his usually well trained abs was ripped at places and was far from a being in a good condition. The black indian leg dress was almost alright, although pretty dirty. But his skin...

Judar was littered in black and purple bruises, deep cuts and other wounds, some obviously over a month old, but untreated. It was obvious he had gotten those injuries even before he had appeared in Sindria a month ago, that was clear to see for untrained eyes even like Sinbads. Which led Sinbad to the conclusion, that it was most probably Al-Tharmens work. Grinding his teeth, his eyes fell on the shackles - his feet were connected with a chain, fastened around his ankles. As where his wrists. Around his neck, there was a chocker, and from there a chain went to the shackles on his wrists, so every time he'd use move his arms and hands, the choker would scratch around his throat and the golden jewellery there, leaving ugly strangling marks. 

Seeing him like this, Sinbad was honestly surprised that the Magi was even on his feet. It was visible that it took all for him just to stand, yet he was standing his ground against that witch. Finally, as he looked at Judars face, he was horrified of the bad eyebags beneath the magicians eyes. Usually, Judar was always pretty prideful with his appearance, even going so far as wearing make-up. But it seemed like he even stopped that at some time. The kohl on his eyes he would apply was smudged out and next to inexistent, and the usual purple eye-shadow also wasn't there. 

His stomach began to churn. Sure, he didn't really like Judar, but he also didn't _hate_ him. And Sinbad would never ever wish for someone he knew to end like this. Especially knowing that Judar wasn't really evil. It made him feel restless that he wasn't able to do anything right now. He really couldn't, not as long as they had the child. 

" Good boy~ Now come here, we've got something for you." the Al-Tharmen leader smiled, beckoning Judar over. Sinbad heard the Magi click his tongue, but he obeyed nonetheless. Taking step after step, the chains chiming their song of captivity, he walked over until he was in front of her. The woman waved her hand, and one of her magicians stepped forth, holding out a folded paper and a water-skin. He took it and observed it, before grimacing.

" Drugs? Really now?" he snorted, staring at her out of red, defiant eyes.

" You must be stupid to actually think I would trust your whims. Better safe than sorry. You know this stuff well, Judar-chan~ We only stopped adjusting it to you recently, about a year ago." she smiled.

" Oh yeah. I really missed them. It's not easy to look at you without them, after all." he hummed, giving snarky remarks even under these circumstances. He unfolded the paper and held it to his chapped lips, tilting his head back and taking the powder it held into his mouth, before taking a few sips from the water-skin. He gagged slightly, and his reaction to the drug was almost immediate: his pupils got blown until the usual red orbs were almost completely black, though he started coughing also.

Gyokouen waited for about half a minute, before she touched his shoulder. Judar didn't flinch, but he slapped her hands away, glaring at her, before he pushed the water-skin back into the other magicians hands, and threw the paper crumbled to the floor.

" It'll be fine~ we've been training you all your life, after all! Just let your consciousness slide into the darkness. You've always been good at that, my sweet, sweet child." she cooed. Her lulling obviously had an effect, as the males eyelids lidded a bit. All of him relaxed slightly, and the next time she touched his shoulder, he did nothing to get her away from him. 

Sinbad had the slight hope that they would let go of the girl now, but of course, they didn't. Instead, he flinched as she drew back her hand, and slapped the oracles cheek hard. The males head flew to the side, but he didn't react aside from that. At least at first. After a few seconds, his gaze went to the empress, and he spit out to the side, before tilting his head to the the other side.

" Come on, this isn't like you, witch~" he snorted, not even fazed, even though his cheek had turned a burning red at the impact. " Unless you are getting old, right~?" he cracked a grin, taunting her even further. This. This was the Judar Sinbad knew. Uncaring, cocky, loose tongue. Had he forgotten about Mirtha, because of the drug? Or was he just stalling for time and bluffing? Maybe he was just suicidal right now? What did that drug _do_!?  
Again, she hit him, this time with more force, and again and again, until he fell to the ground. Even now he didn't fight back, and as he wiped blood from his lips, he just chuckled. It was eerily silent aside from that. 

Apparently pleased, Gyokouen grabbed her staff tighter and swayed it to the side once, and Judars restraints fell to the ground with a loud sound. Well, most of them - the choker around his throat stayed. He touched it, showing a mocking smirk.

" How nice of you to continue sucking away my magoi, wench. Are you satisfied now? It's not like I have a chance against you at the moment anyways. If you keep destroying me like this, you could have let the rest of the chains on also. Or simply given it another week, at most." 

" Oh dear... not by far... That wouldn't be fun enough! After you went against me, you deserve all my attention." she chuckled, raising her staff high into the air, and calling down another thunder bold, this one way stronger than before. It crashed down right on the helpless human girl, making her scream, and then collapse to the ground. The bystanders screamed in shock and fear, but when the thunder subsided, Mirtha was still alive. Gyokouen didn't let it through that she was surprised at all, but her gaze went to the hostage for a second, before going back to the grinning Judar.

" What? Suspecting me, grandma?" he smirked, seating himself cross-legged in front of her on the floor, sneering up at her. He waved his empty hands, snickering. " As you can see, I don't even have my wand in my hands. We both know we can't do anything worth mentioning without a staff or wand, even though we're powerful. We are still _frail_ when it comes down to it." he smiled mad, and seeing her eye twitch just the slightest bit, he laughed loudly. 

" You forgot I'm not the only Magi around here." he then whispered, his voice hoarse, but Sinbad would swear he heard excitement and taunting in it. His eyes wandered to Aladdin, and he noticed the tight grip around his staff and how his pupils were also blown. Looking back to Judar, his eyes had regained a bit of color. Which was weird, although he couldn't quite grasp why, at the moment.

" Oh, you mean Solomon's arrogance. I didn't forget him, but he is no threat to me. Will never be, as has his father never been." she sneered. " But both of us know that this lightning wasn't all I can pull off. If you really want the girl to live, you are going to have to play the pet we raised you to be." she waved her hand trough the air, dismissing another thought towards Aladdin. 

It was exactly what Judar and Balbadds Magi wanted, Sinbad realized. Whatever was going on, there was a silent kind of communication between the three friends and the black Magi. His golden eyes went towards Ja'far, and he met his counsellors green eyes for just a second. He was asking. Silently asking _who do you bet on, Sinbad?_

And the answer was coming to him soon after, when his gaze went back to Aladdin. Aladdin was different from the other Magi, they all knew. In a sense, he was as different as Sinbad to this world. Special. Loved by fate. And considering that even though the young Magi was far from being an adult, he did make the right decisions until now. Every time.

Aladdin, Sinbad thought, probably knows something he himself doesn't. His best bet is to trust in that intuition, and so his eyes briefly flicker back to Ja'far, before he loses his tightly clenched jaw the tiniest bit, blinking just once. 

Ja'far, always quick to catch on the hidden meanings of his king and friend, still wants to hit him. He probably will, after this is all over. But for now, he will follow Sinbads lead, and trust in Aladdin - and _that_ means trusting in Judar. The white haired advisor was sure he doesn't like this, especially considering that the black Magi was also currently **drugged**... but oh well. If something here was really going to go wrong, he'd simply blame it all on Sinbad.

And ban all alcohol for the next month. Or longer.

" So, what do you want me to do?" Judar spoke up, still sitting on the floor, licking his lips as he felt something wet at the corner of his mouth, and cringed at the metallic taste of blood. It's disgusting, but he's too far gone to actually really care about it - as long as it is his _own_ blood. " Want me to strip? You DO like to humiliate me, after all. Ah, but wait, there would be so much more fun to do at the moment! How about breaking my bones? Haven't done that in a long while, huh? Or, making my body move so I'll cut my stomach open? You had a phase when you really liked to make me do that. Ah, there was also that one time where you enjoyed to lock me away in ice while I was still conscious. So, what will it be? Something old? Something new? How about ripping of my skin for a change? I believe that would be a new kind of experience. " he sneers up at her, suggesting different kinds of torture. 

Sinbad wishes he wouldn't listen to this. He doesn't know what to think of this situation. It's just _wrong_. Did they... did they really do all that stuff to their own Magi? If they did, then that would explain Judars overall bad character. He felt sick. Nobody should be tortured like that, and he was a little bit frightened, to be honest; to speak about such things as lightly as Judar was doing, needed some guts. 

Sinbad still remembered his time as a slave, when he had been broken down by the torture. He still remembered the freezing cold, the panic, the **fear** edged into his bones, until his mind had shut down. He remembered how she had... made him fixated on her, and how it had been Masrur that had helped him out of his stupor.. out of his shell with which he had protected himself. He never spoke about those month. It was still ingrained in his every being, though. Listening to Judar simply count the ways they had made him suffer, spoke to his darker side. It made his Rukh resonate, and he took a few silent, but calming breaths.

" No, I'll probably do that later. For now, you're going to undo your spells. I know you are weaving a heap of them, even now." Gyokouen smiled. " And because I know you have hidden attack spells, after that, you will hand me you wand~!"

There's a bit of a silence, and Aladdin has to blink against the wave of anger and _madness_ that floods him at the mere suggestion to undo the spells. Yeah, that order obviously pissed Judar off. Aladdin cringes and he has to let go of the reigns that keep the others consciousness together, so Judar actually _listens_ to the order. He doesn't want Judar to fall to the drugs, but he knows if he interferes too much, they will blow their chance up, and that would simply be more than stupid. 

As he slowly stops protecting Judars mind, his blue eyes start to clear a little again, whilst Judars red ones get more black due to the drugs strong hold. He still obviously refuses, and simply glares at the Al-Tharmen leader. Then, after a few silent seconds, his hand grabs beneath his choli, and he pulls out his wand. The grip on it is ever so lose, and with a almost graceless wave of it, something in the air changes. 

Alibaba almost makes a double take at all the things that suddenly appear around them - sharp spears made of ice, a small tornado, hovering just beneath the barrier protecting Sindria. Then, there's also that weird monster, reminding the blonde prince of the black Djinns they used to fight against. There was probably more, but as soon as his eyes catch a glimpse of it, they just up and disappear. Even though Alibaba is far from being a magician or sensitive to magic things, even he can feel the empty buzzing in the air around them. 

" Did he have all of them set up already..? But since when..?" Morgiana breathes out slowly, her face a little pale, and Aladdin swallows dry.

" From the beginning." he just whispers, lowering his head a little. From the beginning was a far stretch. None of them had actually seen Judar with his wand, so the spells had been woven before that, already..?

" That's... just crazy..! I knew he was bad news, but that's just.." Alibaba shivered, but he was suddenly hit hard, and his hand went to Amon's sword.

" Don't speak badly about him!" the woman whose children were in danger at the moment hysterically shouted. Her eyes were screaming fear and frustration, anger and resentment, but at the moment, she was simply mad at the blonde prince.

" He may be the devil for all I care, he saved my newborn and my daughter, more times than I can count in just the past month! He's our saviour, and I won't stand to see you talk badly about him!" she shouted. 

" Ah, how sweet. I see, I see. You've made some friends." Gyokouens voice made everyone look back to the black haired woman, and it was almost too late for Aladdin to make another Borg around the poor mother. In the short notice until the lighting came down, however, it wasn't nearly strong enough to hold out, so it broke down after the first big impact and the woman went down screaming. Aladdin paled, shouting in alarm. 

The woman came out alive, though -as did the child in her arms. Relief washed over Aladdin as he traced the magic signature that was left back down to Yamuraiha. 

" Stop it." Judars voice was monotone, and he waved his wand through the air one more time, and a thin threaded net became visible in the air - some of the generals were tangled in it, without them having even noticed it, but the net broke with a pearlescent, chiming snap, and disappeared like all of Judars other little tricks. After that, the fallen Magis gaze simply laid on Gyokouen.

" Didn't you listen? All of them." she tilted her head, and a kind of dark amusement seeped into her expression, making Sinbad bite his cheek. All of those spells hadn't been detected - neither by Yamuraiha or Ja'far, nor him. They must have been there the whole month, prepared... probably for this. Sinbad had always known Judar was a great magician, and after Yamuraiha had explained to him that water based magic needed completely different mindset than fire, wind or sound, he had thought that Judar must have hidden a lot of things. Seeing this now underlined that train of thought.

What he had revelled here, was a part of his true potential - something he had never actually pulled in fights against Sinbad or Sindria. If he had, the king had no doubt, Sindria would long since have frozen over or sunk back into the sea. He took a calming breath once more, closely watching the Magi.

All of them, the empress had said. There were still more spells? More hidden attacks? How he was able to do them, keep them up in his condition, was beyond the high king. He watched as the drugged male stiffened, before he grimaced, and another pull at the atmosphere made Sinbads stomach churn. 

Scars. 

Judar was littered with scars. Some on his stomach, old and pale, on his collarbones, on his hipbones from what he could see, and on his lower back. There were definitely more, but he wasn't near enough to see the whole thing. Though, it was enough to give him an idea of the torture Judar had gone through. And it explained why the younger male always was so careful when it came to wounds, or his hair. If he had used a spell to cover all those imperfections, it wasn't hard to guess that he hated them, probably was ashamed of them.

Gyokouens smile bordered on madness, as she sneered at him. " Well, I can see you won't completely listen to me. That's fine, it would be boring if you wouldn't show any spunk." she sighed, waving her staff. With a crack, Judars wand broke in pieces.

Sinbad doubted that he actually noticed that, as he didn't even bat an eye.

" Now, one last chance to save those lives. Get me the first class singularities metal vessels. It's sad enough that I have to give you the order a second time. Be a little bit faster now, got it? " she chimed, making a ushering gesture towards Sinbad. 

Their eyes met for a few moments, his golden orbs clashing against her blue eyes, his with a seething rages, hers full of scorn. Their silent battle was interrupted as Judar made his way over to Sinbad, stopping only inches away from him.

The high king swallowed, lowering his gaze to search of any sign of consciousness in the Magis eyes, but painfully avoiding any further stare or eye-contact. Those weren't the lively red eyes full of mirth and mischief he had come to dread. Not the eyes that took in his kingdom and declared war on him in anger and madness. No. His eyes were black, reflecting what they saw, without taking it in. Sinbad saw his own suffering reflection in those black eyes, and when Judar stretched his hands towards him, there was no hesitation. No blinking, no hitching of his breath. Nothing. Only emptiness. Sinbad had never guessed that once, at some point in his life, he'd come to miss the crazy, but knowing glint in the eyes of Judar.

He closed his eyes for a moment, as he started to take of his vessels, one by one, and handed them over, without words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there lovelies ♥
> 
> First off, thank's for all the nice comments, the Kudos and subscribtions!!! They make my day everytime and make me giddy and grinning >///<
> 
> This is already chapter 5 huh... puh! I do have a lot more planned out already ( and many more, not hastily scribbled down ideas...), but as I am currently still taking mayor tests ( it's the last weel though!!), I am behind for the next chapters. I don't know if I'll have chapter 6 ready on time for next week's update...  
> I'll try! So, until then: Have fun and enjoy! R & R appreciated!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > **_" She has been through hell._ **   
>  **_So believe me when I say,_ **   
>  **_ fear her _ **   
>  **_when she looks into a fire, and smiles"_ **   
>  _\- e. corona_   
> 

They didn't talk. The atmosphere was thick, almost touchable, filled with distress, anger, hurt, sadness, grief and fear. Even though not many bystanders were trained soldiers, much less civilians, there were the exceptions of Ireena, Mirthas mother, Mirtha herself as the hostage, and the twin children. One of them was still held tightly in Aladdins arms. The blue-haired Magi took a few deep breaths. 

His eyes wandered to the blue haired water magician - Yamuraiha. She was helping the poor woman on the ground, the second child in her arms as she whispered comforting words to the civilian in pain. Aladdin wished he could help, but he couldn't. Aside from the devastating fact that he simply sucked poorly at healing magic, or; well... water magic in general really, he had to focus on the scene at hand.

There was something he had learned in his time in Magnoshtadt, and the recent years. As a Magi, you have a privilege: you get to touch the rukh. But that also meant, _you_ have to touch everything _else_. Not in the strict sense of the word, but it did mean that he had to chose, whether he wanted to or not, who would live, and who would die. He had to touch the fate, so to say. Even if he wasn't directly interfering, everything a Magi should do ended in deciding other peoples fate.

He had instinctively chosen Alibaba. He was good, and kind, and always tried to keep the death casualties really low. But whenever Aladdin made a choice, or Alibaba made a choice, other people got involved- hurt, happy, or sometimes, in worse situations, they die. Over the... last few month, the Torran prince had done much thinking on this topic. He couldn't evade this fate - but he could actively chose the way that would leave the least wounds in people's hearts. 

He couldn't save Ireena, because right now, it was necessary that he helped Judar. The other Magi was important, and he was necessary for the balance of this world. Besides, if he just came to his senses, he could help many more people. And... well, he deserved someone who helped him. He had suffered enough, and most people here would probably agree on this.

The only question was: how was he supposed to help Judar? His frown deepened as he inwardly danced along the outer realms of Judars mind, just skiting along without actually touching it - like a child would want to touch something feeble and beautiful, but didn't just dare to really press it's clumsy fingers against the cold surface, in fear of doing something wrong. 

But no, he had to think of something, and fast! His gaze jumped to the broken wand on the floor, and to Yamuraihas staff. Without a staff or wand, Judar was useless. Well, mostly, at least. He didn't have enough control for a large scale spell to attack the Al-Tharmen mages, much less had he any idea how to shatter Gyokouens Borg. 

! But wait. An idea crossed his mind. It was stupid, and suicidal, and so.. SO wrong in so many ways, and dangerous. Really, it was stupid. And anyways, if he couldn't trust Judar, or his state of mind, this would most likely end in a disaster. He should think of something else. But as he watched how Sinbad stripped of his last vessel, he knew that was the only option they had at the moment, and so he clenched his jaw shut, and silently set his plan into motion, as he turned to Yamuraiha.

For Sinbad, it was like he got stripped of his clothes. No, worse - because let's be honest, he always somehow ended up naked. But never had he felt quite so bad, not even when his djinns had been stolen from him, back in the days on his way to Balbbad. His eyes scanned the area once. The children's mother was full of hope, Aladdin and Mirtha were determined, but silent. Once more, Sinbads only option was to trust in his friends and comrades; but for once he did not feel comfortable with that.

Judar slightly stumbled, and Sinbads attention was back on him in the blink of an eye. He watched as his vessels, one by one, were handed to the mages. Not even directly to the empress. he had to confess, he was equally relieved and offended by that, though he knew it was better that way - it left a chance to get them back somehow. 

As soon as all his 7 vessels were taken, the released the girl. They shoved her away from them and onto the ground. For a moment, Sinbad relaxed a bit more - just until a loud crash resounded and lightning fell down on the girl. Everyone screeched in shock, and the high king had to raise his hands to block his eyes from the light. 

An alarmed shout broke through the stunned silence as the spell ended, and the girls dead body exuded smoke. It was Judars horrified shout that had resonated from the surrounding, and in a display of open rage, he grabbed Gyokouens robes, staring her down.

" What are you doing, bitch!? The deal was that I listen and you let her go!" he shouted, fighting through the drugs hold on his own. His seething rage helped him think clear, and he didn't care what would happen. Gyokouen had not kept to her words.

" Oh really now? _I_ was the one who broke our deal? Isn't it YOU who still doesn't listen? You should have broken the connection to the infant when I told you to dispel all your spells." her voice was bored, and she sighed, as if disappointed in him. She didn't fear him - obviously, and as he had no wand anymore, he wasn't any sort of danger for her honestly. 

" Oh no, that's not how we're playing now...!" Judar growled, his hand flying up and curling around her delicate neck now. But before he could close his hand enough, sparks went through his body, visible as twitching white electric currents around his battered form, and he whined. 

" No, that's true, my lovely, useless, stupid Judar. That's not how we play~" she agreed, smiling. Against his will, his hand was moved away from her throat, and even as he tried to withstand the spell, it only ended in him getting even more shocks through his body. 

Seeing as he was obviously being a stubborn man, Gyokouen send more electricity through him, until he was screaming and coughing up blood. She didn't care if he died now. It would probably be a teaching to Solomons brat, and anyways, she didn't need Judar that much. Maybe, she had thought, she could have used him as material for the medium. He was pure black, after all. But it would be more fun to push the high king completely into darkness, and then use him!

" Judar!" Sinbads shout made Gyokouen stop and turn to him slightly. Judar fell to the floor, unmoving. Many patches of his skin were completely burned off, showing his flesh. He was still breathing, though, and Sinbad wasn't the only one who watched in horror as the Magi pushed himself on his hands, and then onto his feet, swaying, but standing.

" You think you're so invincible.." he growled in a low voice, spitting blood to the side. Gyokouens head turned to him, and she watched, eyes slightly narrowed.

" I guess, I'm really through with you. Go on - kill me. Here and now. Because I swear by god, this will be your last chance." he said, tilting his head back and sneering at her. She already raised her staff, when he cracked a secure smile, and she halted.

" Though... that might be a little... suicidal, to kill me now. Hey, witch - what do you think happened to Hakuryuu and Hakuei~?" he asked, tilting his head to the side.

" What do you mean? My cute children are surely hiding, but that is of no matter to me. I will find them, eventually." she retorted.

" Oh, surely~ surely~ " he snickered. " Because you need either of their bodies to continue living your stupid, miss leaded life!" he cackled, and as she called down another bolt of lightning, Judar actually laughed through the pain. The world seemed to sway under his feet and the corners of his vision began to black out. At this point in time, he didn't care whether he lived or died anymore. Even the pain was nothing to him. He didn't even really notice it anymore, and that somehow amused him. After all, it had been Al-Tharmen who taught him to deal with pain.

But he still stood, and so he just sighed - as if he was disappointed in her, for not figuring out what he was hinting at. Just like she had done only a bit earlier. He chuckled. " Oh dear~ Did you really think I knew _nothing_ , witch?" he smiled at her in pity. It was all crazy - his madness was showing through, but who cared? Judar has never been in his right mind according to others.

" Shut up." she warned, but it just made his smile that much wider, until it was unnatural, the mirth back in his red ringed eyes.

" Shut up? No~ This is long overdue. Because, know what? If Sinbad where to kill you now, you'd simply **die**." his smile turned gentle, and her grip on her staff fastened until her knuckles were white, and her arm vibrated. Judar stepped up to her, until his face was directly before hers and he leaned down slightly, and into the silence his next words weighted that much more:

" That is because I killed them myself. Both, Hakuei and Hakuryuu - the last of your offspring, your last blood relatives. You have no body to take over after this one get's destroyed." He took a strand of her hair, twisting it around his finger.

" Rejoice! Your stupid 'flow' has been broken! I'm good at doing what I was taught~" he snickered evil. " I'll set you free, of your struggle, Gyokouen.... no, _Arba_." he whispered. 

As if snapping out of a trance, she screamed - in untamed rage and madness, she screamed and snapped at him, starting to hit him with her staff and shot one lightning spell after the other at him.

It was the perfect opportunity for Sinbad to get his vessels back, and he did just that, as the Al-Tharmen members and especially the empress were distracted. Together with Masrur, it was easy work to get the poor magicians out of the way, and his hands on his vessels.

" Bararark Kauza!"

" Bararark Sei!" Ja'far and Masrur activated their vessels, both going at Gyokouen in a rush. It didn't work, though. She let off Judar, who collapsed to the floor with a groan, turned to them and activated her Borg. It was effectively enough, as her Borg was different than others. It was defensive, as well as offensive. The surface twisted into something akin to the image of Dragons, attacking the generals from all sides.

It seemed, only Sinbad somehow made progress, as he ended the lower mages lives. Breaking their Borg was easy enough for him, and he turned around to face Gyokouen together with his men. Judas words crossed his mind once more.

Gyokouen - no, Arba, was vulnerable right now. He didn't have enough time to think about the details, and honestly he didn't want to think of Hakuryuus death, but the point was, he could destroy Al-Tharmen right now. Forever, finally. The rest, he would have to think about later.

He thrust his sword into the air, shouting the name of his very first Djinn " Baal! I command you, dwell in my body!"

Thunder crashed down, and from that a fully equipped Sinbad exited, going for the evil empress. The blue scales covered a vast amount of his skin, and they glistened in between the sparks the two exchanged. In between Ja'far and Masrur tried their luck, but her Borg was too strong.

It all went nuts from there on. Even though it was just one person, it could have as well been an army. No, the army might have been easier to defeat than Gyokouen. Not only her Borg, but all the spells she casted, it was dangerous, troublesome, and in the clashing of wills, black Rukh fluttered in between, distracting Sinbad and his men. 

His only hope was, that Yamuraiha or Sharkkan had an eye on the mother and the children. He spared a glance in their direction, but flinched back and had to cover his sword once more, as one of the Borg's dragons went at him. He clicked his tongue in annoyance. "Gyokouen! Fight for real, god damn it!" 

He clenched his eyes shut tight against a wave of sparks, blinking away the white dots dancing in front of his eyes as a result of not being fast enough. In a fit of rage, he screamed out his anger and trust Baal forward, and finally pierced something.

Only, that it wasn't Gyokouen. Sinbad paled, as he looked at the body in front of him, the sounds of the fight blurring out. His focus narrowed down to the coughing and the blood that left the frail frame of the Magi in front of him.

It was Judar.

He had stabbed Judar, not Gyokouen.

His mind seemed to go blank as Judar doubled over, obviously in pain, but somehow conscious. Sinbad had forgotten the Magi was even there. He had been as good as dead just minutes ago, lying on the floor. And now..?

" D-damn..." Judar whined, his voice not above a whisper, but somehow in all the chaos, Sinbad still made out his words. 

" Th-this kind... of wasn't... the way I wanted... this to go... Fuck..." slowly breathing through, he collapsed, but he was collected in the arms of the high king who went down with him. Judars eyes were closed and it was visibly taking him everything to force them open again, to stare up at Sinbad.

" Stupid.... king..." he whispered, flinching when Sinbad pulled Baal back out. 

" Hey, stay alive, you hear me? there are too many questions from this battle, I need answers! Don't die by my sword, Judal!"

" Selfish..." the Magi coughed, a hand going up to cover the wound in his stomach. true enough, a normal man might live through this, but Judar was already at the end, and a frail magician on top. " Wanted to be..... " he said.

Sinbad had to lean in to understand his words better. 

" Intimate... wanted to be, with you.... not... like this... stupid king..." his words stopped for a second as a coughing fit took him over, but then he rambled right on. " Stupid...selfish... warped... too kind... wouldn't... choose me..." 

" H-hey...! Mister, don't...!" the civilian mother crawled over to them. Sinbad noticed she was full of blood and, with horror, he realized she had received some fatal wounds. He shook Judars body to make the Magi stay conscious.

" You... you can't... die" the woman whispered weakly. She was crying and swaying. Sinbad stretched an arm towards her and steadied her a bit, but kept Judar gathered near him. He stayed silent at what he was witnessing now. He noticed Judar grimace, and push himself upright the tiniest bit.

" Not... gonna die here... woman.." he rasped, suppressing a whine of pain and fighting against the black. The comforting strength of Aladdins mind entered his consciousness, and he swallowed the blood now, instead of hacking it up.

" You still... need to name my daughter.."

" Name her yourself... Already told ya..." he groaned. 

Somehow, it made her smile, and Sinbad thought he somehow understood a little more, what had happened here recently.

" You saved her... You name her..." the woman smiled, slowly going limb atop the kings arm. " It's... Ireena... Mirtha... Jelez.... Mister..?"

" Not... not family. I'm not family..." Judar forced himself to say. 

" You have to be..." she said. " Leaving them with you..... Know you can do it... Mister..."

" Hey, don't! Come one, please...! Both of you!" Sinbad was helpless. He couldn't help either of them. Could only watch.

" Judar... not 'Mister'..." he halted for a second, before closing his eyes. He didn't need to watch her dying. He could feel how the Rukh were starting to take her with them, away from her body. " 'Shilya'. There... happy?"

"... yes.." 

That was it. The world seemed to fall apart for him, but even then, Judar didn't cry. He stopped forcing himself to appear in better shape than he actually was, and Sinbad laid him down on the floor. He wanted to say something. Tell him to kill her, tell him not to die, tell him... something! 

But he didn't. Instead, he closed his eyes and Sinbad got up and returned to battle as explosions surrounded them.

The rage he was displaying now surprised everyone. But he wasn't the only one. The Rukh gathered around Aladdin, so strongly it was visible even to none-magicians like Sinbad and his generals. Alibaba and Morgiana were crying and fighting alike, and like that, the king returned to battling like a madman. Something he hadn't done for a long time. Going overboard, so he ended up destroying houses and street stalls, and even his men retreated to get out of his way. 

Somehow, the fight after that was a blur. It seemed unreal, and only when a warning shout reached his ears did he take a step back and blinked out of his rage. Ja'far was standing beside him, his household vessel in his hand, but breathing heavily. Probably almost out of Magoi.

The Borg dragon attacked them, and Ja'far was hit back, crashing down next to Ireenas body and Judar. 

" Uncle Ja'far, it's gonna be alright." Aladdins voice made Ja'far look up, only to be surprised at what he saw. 

Aladdin was helping Judar sit upright, and Judar had Yamuraihas staff. It was a weird scene, mainly because Judar was supposed to be their enemy. And yet, here they were, trusting in whatever the two Magi would come up with.

" Are you alright?" the younger Magi asked, and Judar whined, a hand at the wound in his stomach.

" Fuck no..." he rasped out. " How could I be? _Especially_ after the stupid king went and stabbed me!" he coughed, grimacing when he tasted blood again. " Well... I can't exactly say I didn't deserve it, though..."

" Judar! Don't think like that!" the younger one looked at him in sadness. " You have to live! You've got children to take care of now, remember!?"

" No... that was a selfish request..." Judar swayed as he grabbed the staff stronger, his pale hand shaking around the wood. " I'm just gonna kill that witch... and then, I'm going to follow her..." he sighed, his eyes sliding close once more, before Aladdin shook him gently. 

" How's he..?" Judar asked, without even saying who he meant. Aladdin looked towards the battle for a moment, before he raised his short staff. 

" Bad. Let's do this. He needs your help, Judar." 

Ah, now he was starting to coax Judar into this. It was a stupid tactic, but nonetheless a lopsided smile creped on his lips. " As if... Sinbad never really needed my help..." he murmured. " But... that's at least a nice thought, I guess..." 

Ja'far clutched at the wound on his side, but didn't evade his gaze. Instead, he watched.

Watched as Aladdin cast Solomons Wisdom. Watched as the eight pointed star appeared on his forehead, and with a weaker glow, also on Judars forehead. 

" We only have one chance, Shorty... Don't mess up the spell. I can't control something I don't know the nature of." Judar warned.

Aladdin nodded, face showing determination, while Judar had his eyes closed, his body lax against the younger magi sitting beneath him and steadying him.

Loud thunder rolled through the sky that darkened, all the white and black flashes gathering at one point behind the clouds. 

And when the spell fell, Ja'far prayed to whatever divine being he thought existed in this world, that Judar truly and genuinely was as good a magician as he always said he was... and that he really wished to become Sindrias Magi, because if this failed, The whole of this Island would end up being nothing more than a rumour in future years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, I somehow made it -_-  
> I had to work far into today, and just finished this up. It's not really proofread. I will return and do that at a later time this week. For now, I' just happy I made it -W-  
> Just so you guys know, this story will be divided into two arcs. We are at about the middle of the first^^
> 
> As always, R&R is very much appreciated ♥


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > **_" I dont wanna die.  
>  But I ain't keen on living either."_ **
>> 
>> _\- Robbie Williams_   
> 

" Are you sure we are going the right way, high Priest?" Marccio asked. Judar rolled his eyes. 

" Yes. I told you, this is the way I took! You'll see, we will be there in no time!" he reassured. He may just be 12 years old, but he knew where the fuck he went! God damn, adults could be so dumb at times!

Naturally, that was obviously _not_ the way he had took previously. Or maybe it was. Just that the houses had rearranged themselves. Ugh, he was so lost...!

" You're lost, aren't you?" Marccio sighed, shaking his head. Well, what did he expect? That child was raised to forget things easily, because it came in handy when they did the ritual on him. But on times like this, it was just exhausting. Whatever it was Judar had wanted to show him, he would never get to see it. Not that he actually really cared.

" ... Jep." Judar nodded, the 'p' plopping at the end and nodded, somehow even looking proud of that fact, and not the least bit ashamed. " That's because you kept pestering me and asking me questions! Geee, if you had just let me concentrate, I'd have found my way!" he accused the man, pushing his hands on his hips. The heavy brocades on his shoulders were starting to get on his nerves, but he ignored that feeling. 

" Of course. I apologize, Priest." Marccio grimaced, slightly bowing his head. Better to let Judar stay appeased. The boy was slowly starting to form the way they wanted. " Shall we go back now? I ordered the maids to prepare peaches for you, Priest. And you need to rest before tonight."

Judar stiffened. Tonight? They'd do the ritual tonight, again...? He thought they - no... no, he really shouldn't think about it. The less he struggled, the less in pain or agony he was after that. So he clenched his teeth, simply nodding. 

He felt Marccios hand at the small of his back, turning him in the direction back to where they came from. He flinched and grimaced in disgust, but said nothing. " Is it really necessary? Wasn't the last just a week ago?"

" It was a month ago, Priest." Marccio simply said, carefully watching Judars thoughtful gaze.

" ... Really...? I could have sworn... Well, whatever. You better tell the maids to pamper me afterwards!" he growled, and Marccio grinned. 

" Of course, Priest. You're important, so I'll see to it." he nodded. He didn't see any reason to tell Judar that he had been right; the last ritual had been just three days ago, but it was better if Judar was obedient. He was less troublesome like that.

 

_____________________________________________________

 

Judar groaned as he rolled on his stomach, fighting the urge to let go and simply sleep. The low, but clear sound of slowly falling drops echoed in the cell he was in. It was dark, but Judar knew it was around midday. He was used to the dark, so by now he was pretty good with guessing the time. 

Another groan left him as he pulled himself up and hoisted his bode against the wall in his back. He grimaced at the stickiness of the substance, and the metallic taste of the air. The floor was just faintly sprayed with blood, and the dripping he heard, he knew, also was blood. Not his, of course. No, Judar had been a little... disobedient, yes, but not enough to get lethal wounds. Not this time, at least.

He faintly thought about what he had been doing before. There had been that woman; He forgot her name. But... oh, she had conquered that dungeon of his, alright! That he remembered. What was it... Seren-something..? Let's just call her Siren for now. She had conquered that dungeon. He had named her King-candidate, hadn't he? 

He didn't quite recall. But he remembered that he had met someone. Someone radiant. It was a young man. Mauve hair... Weird. He had the feeling that he vividly remembered, but when he tried to imagine anything from the past days, it seemed so far...

He sniffed, his nose itched a little. He tried raising his hand, but grimaced. Oh, yeah. His arms were broken. Why were they broken again? Didn't matter. As soon as he was getting out of here, he'd go back and help Kouen with a Dungeon. Yes, that would be a nice change. Someone would heal him for sure. Because he was their Priest, their Oracle - he was important, and powerful. 

The Kou empire was growing day by day, and Al-Tharmen had finally been granted access to the palace. So now he had a chance to show his skills. He was often bored, so he always made trouble. But, they had said that war would be fun. If there was war, he wouldn't be bored. And to cause a war, he should bestow power upon people. People he chose himself.

That was what a Magi was supposed to do. Raise a King and help him govern a great country. He was going to help make Kou big. And then he would help to start a war. He slightly wondered if he could meet that radiant man once again. Judar would love to make that man powerful. Something in him called for that male. 

He sighed. " Geee... are they going to let me rot in here...?" he groaned, annoyed and bored and probably in pain, but that went unregistered. The blood was seeping his warmth out from him, but he didn't bat an eye at that. He was a blue magician, with a thing for ice. He couldn't care less about the cold. 

Maybe he could pass the time and try to remember that man, he decided.

 

___________________________________________________________

 

He spew out his meal, as soon as he registered what they had just made him eat. He's been retching for at least half an hour; his stomach and his abs hurt like shit, but there was no way he'd leave anything in his system. He breathed heavy, reaching for the water next to him, and downed the whole glass in one go. 

Tears streaked down his cheeks, and he was nauseous once again when the water hit his stomach. He chocked a little, but swallowed dry. Once, twice, fighting for a moment, before giving in, and throwing it back up again. The contents of his vomit were only water, mixed with gastric acid. Nothing more. 

Maybe he had emptied his stomach finally. He cleaned his mouth with water, and only took a few sips of the clear liquid after that, always waiting in between. Weakly, he made it back over to his bed. He slowly sat down on it, and laid down carefully after that, closing his eyes. 

Disgusting. He'd never forget what they did this time. How could they do this? Judar knew very well that they had no qualms about killing people - he didn't have that either. He had been brought up, knowing how to torture people, to make them go insane due to pain. He had been polishing his healing skills on slaves he had to wound himself prior to his training sessions. 

Judar was by no means a weakling. He did most of what he was being told, but whenever he had the chance, he slipped away from them. He didn't really know why. It's not like he hated Marccio or Ithnan. Those guys were pretty cool, even though they were adults. But they always let him do whatever, teaching him powerful, destructive magic, or taking him places where he could go rampage. 

Maybe it was the fact, that Judas rarely was allowed to leave the organisations grasp for long. Maybe, that he never really left Kou for more than a day at a time. But since he had been taught how to levitate, he left more often. In the dead of the night, or right after a ritual. Lately, he started to forget what they did to him in the sessions. He didn't really care either. He hadn't woken up in pain lately, so everything was peachy for him. His Rukh never seemed disturbed, always neatly black. 

Not really asleep, nor awake, he remembered meeting Hakuryuu the other day. A cute young boy. So full of hate and disgust, so determined. It had reminded him of Sinbad, and suddenly Judar had felt like going to see the man. So he had left. And sure enough, he had found that jerk pretty easily. Lately, they weren't on good terms. Sinbad accused him of things, but to be honest, Judar didn't remember ever having had a different king candidate than Kouen.

He felt like Sinbad would make a great king, though. So he had offered his services. He had been turned down quite quickly, and Judar had been bummed. He frowned, trying to understand the sinking feeling in his stomach at that thought. He wondered if Sinbad would do the same things to him as Al-Tharmen. Probably, right? That's how a Magi was supposed to be raised, they said. 

He wouldn't mind being touched by him, though. Not really, at least. Some part of his memory was lost, but he remembered he got his paws on some beverage, and then...? Then he had talked almost normally to Sinbad, hadn't he? That guy suggested something, and Judar had changed into different clothes... An indian leg-dress, a Choli and a Chunnari... 

It was a good feeling not wearing the heavy brocades of the Kou country, so he had left with this. He didn't remember much more. 

He came back here to find his favoured slave missing, and Ithnan as well as Marccio in a disturbingly bad mood. They didn't explain anything, though. Some hours later as he was served his meal, he hadn't understood - the connection between his missing servant and the strange taste of the meat...

Judar woke from his half slumber with choking, and stumbled to the bathroom. God, he'd never touch meat again.

Never.

____________________________________________________  
____________________________________________________

" How is he?" Sinbad asked the two magicians in the room. Even though the temperature outside was warm, like always in Sindria, the atmosphere in the palace has been frighteningly cold in the last weeks. The people didn't dare to talk. Not like the usual maids, chattering and spreading rumours; this time, nobody uttered a word. 

Maybe they were afraid to invite the inevitable, maybe they were afraid of the reactions of his generals. Maybe they were even afraid if their kings reaction to hear the people talking behind hands. He wasn't sure, but either way, at least in the palace, things have been difficult in the time since Gyokouen had come.

Aladdin turned to him half, dark rings beneath his eyes, and eyes somehow a little colder than Sin was used to. The Magi shrugged with his shoulders, and turned back to the unconscious black haired male, lying in the bed. 

" It's getting worse, my king. Aladdin and I have healed his physical wounds quite well, but it seems his mind has taken deep damage. I thought he might wake after he is healed, but..." Yamuraiha explained, but trailed off. She, too, seemed tired, but over all worried and a little pained.

" He doesn't want to wake up." Aladdin said, voice low. Sin slightly tilted his head, but Aladdin continued before he could pose his question. " Judar has gone through so much, and in his opinion, there is nothing left for him here. Nobody who wants him alive." the boy said. " Judar will not wake up anymore... not of his own will, at least." 

" Can you do something...?" Sin asked carefully. 

" Why?"

" What do you mean, 'Why'?" Sinbad frowned. 

Aladdin looked back up at him, and this time, Sinbad could see knowledge in those blue eyes; Knowledge usually gained in years, but this child already had old eyes, he noticed now. Aladdin wasn't the child he wanted to make him out.

" Why do you want me to bring him back? I can, yes. But I would just take him back into a reality where he has nothing but scorn of other people and hatred towards himself."

" The woman wanted him to -"

" This isn't about what other people want him to, uncle Sinbad." Aladdin interrupted. The young magician tilted his head to the side slightly, staring at Sinbad out of deep eyes, that seemed to see all. " This is about why you want me to save him. And what you want with him around. Does Sindria really need a Magi? Would you even let Judar be your Magi? Would you trust him? Can you deal with him on a personal level?" the Torran Prince asked. For a second he let the words seep through. " I guess, you never realized that Judar cared for you very deeply."

" That's not true. In Parthevia, he-"

" In Parthevia he was under the influence of drugs, and when he came to apologize weeks later, you were drunk and beat him up. Do you remember that?"

" What!? No, I didn't-"

" And even though, every time he paid you a visit and offered his services, you never took him seriously. Every time he went back from those visits, they'd torture him until he lost consciousness. Did you ever stop to wonder what Al-Tharmen would think about him wanting to become your Magi?"

" I never thought that Judar might be serious! He's insane, Aladdin! He's unpredictable! If I gave him the slightest chance, he'd have killed my friends and me! My people, too!All he cares about is war and chaos!"

" ... see? Even now, you don't even consider he might actually be serious." Aladdin seemed annoyed, and he turned back to Judar. " All you think about, is what's best for you."

" No, I'm not! I'm thinking about my people, Aladdin!"

" You're not!" Aladdin shouted, sending a glare his way. " You've never given him a chance! Sindria had you and the generals! You don't even NEED a Magi! But you want one anyway! Not for Sindria, but for the sole reason of the appearance! For the power alone! That's one of the reasons I wouldn't be your Magi! Because you don't want someone like Judar, nor like me, or Sheherazade, or Yunan, or even Titus! What you want is a puppet, a symbol!" 

His words sliced the air, and Sinbad was taken aback. Never had he thought Aladdin would say something like this.

" And the worst part of it all, is that Judar knew, and still gladly would have accepted! If you had just given him a chance, he'd have laid his power to your feet, at the slightest hint! Uncle Sinbad, I think you are a great king, don't get me wrong. But you need to get your head sorted out. You're lying to yourself, and in case you didn't know, a Magi can read the Rukh easily. We can _see_ if someone lies. _Especially_ our chosen king." he went from loud, to nothing but a whisper. "... You should leave. I'm going to wipe him down."

" ..." staying silent, Sinbad looked towards Yamuraiha, and nodded. She got up, and after sending a worried gaze towards her disciple, she made her way towards the door.

" Do you try to talk to him, Aladdin?" Sinbad simply asked,staying in the room despite beong told off, and changed the subject.

" He doesn't respond... I guess, he listens to certain topics, but he has no intention of replying... it's like talking to someone half asleep." he stood up and went to get a bowl full of warm water and a towel, before pulling back the blankets. They hadn't really dressed Judar - only a simple Sindrian gown covered him, and Aladdin tugged at the cloth that bound it together in the front, and went to work.

" I feel him prodding at my mind sometimes, but it's just barely there. He skits around the parts revolving around the children, sometimes it seems like he wants to know how you and the rest are doing. But as soon as I try to get in touch with him, he pulls back completely." he admits in worry.

" So he more or less is informed about what is going on out here..?"

" Maybe. I don't quite get this myself. He's a better magician than I am, so he could probably explain this better... maybe dissolve the connection, if he's in the mood and all." Aladdin wiped down Judars slowly raising chest, trying not to stare at all the scars, or the still pinkish wound left by Baals sword. " I guess, I can understand a little bit why he's so afraid of living. It's not easy to be different... it's hard to be alone."

" But he wasn't alone, right? He had Kouen, and Kougyoku seemed to like him quite a bit. And didn't he chose Hakuryuu as a King in the end..?" Sin leaned back against the wall next to the closed door.

The young Magi looked up for a second, before returning to his self assigned work, wiping down the stomach and further down his legs, before answering. 

" Kouen was rather nice to him, but only saw him as a means to get more power, as did Koumei and Kouha. They didn't see hm as a person. Hakuei was nice to him, like Kougyoku but... I guess, Judar was afraid to really befriend them, in a way. And Hakuryuu wasn't his King. Only a King candidate. He chose him, because he reminded him of you."

" What do you mean..? He told me himself, he chose Hakuryuu.." Sinbad saw a rueful smile on Aladdins lips.

" I meant it just like it sounded. Hakuryuu never was more than a candidate. One of many. But his actual King has been someone else all the time. Like me, he chose a King long before he understood what it meant. And as he understood, it was already too late." the boy hummed. " It's difficult to explain. It's Magi stuff, you know...? We may be human, we may be magicians. We may speak the same language, and we may have friends. But when it comes down to it, nobody understands really. You can't see the Rukh. You can't hear it chattering and you can't feel it when it touches your skin. You can't... feel the urge." 

Aladdin started to struggle visibly, his small hands twitching as he searched for words, desperate to bring his feelings across. " The urge to serve, to be there at all times, to fulfil your kings wish. To be accepted and to be... I don't know! We choose a King, and we have... we _need_ to be of help to our chosen. But we also want to connect on a personal level... Judar couldn't do either, caged by Al-Tharmen and his own demons, away from his chosen one." he grimaced.

" I guess, I didn't exactly make his life any easier... I made him remember a lot of awful stuff, and in a way, it's a whole lot my fault that he ended like this..." Aladdin lowered his head, stopping his ministrations. He stayed seated on Judars hips - he was a light weight, so it shouldn't pose a problem.

" If I hadn't messed up that spell, I wouldn't have broken the seal on his memories... If I hadn't broken that seal, then-"

" Then Judar still would have been in trouble. Aladdin, don't fret to much about it. I think, Judar was starting to realize himself that Al-Tharmen was bad. He said it himself, right? That he... killed Hakuryuu and Hakuei, so Gyokouen had nowhere left to hide. Even before you removed it."

" Yeah, but he may have just ended up as a prisoner here... instead of waiting until his body gives in." 

"... Maybe. Maybe not. We can't change it. Let's try to make the best of it for now.." Sinbad sent one last gaze towards the seemingly sleeping male, before he heaved a heavy sigh and left the room. He wandered down the hallways, never stopping and always in motion, trying to get his thoughts back in order. 

At some point he stopped at the inner gardens, looking up at the sky, tinted in red and oranges, mixed with beautiful violets and last stripes of blue. The red reminded him of Judars eyes. 

Back then, when Judar had almost covered the whole palace in ice, those eyes had shown so much. But above all, fear and sorrow. Never before had Sinbad seen anything alike on the Magi's features... No, maybe he had. That one time as he came to declare war on him, he had shown his tears. He had taken pity on him, but when Judar had laughed at him...?

He had thought it was one of his many pranks, but now he was sure those tears had been real. So then, how many times had Sinbad missed the cry for help send in his direction..? It must have been countless times. He should have noticed. He should have known! After Judar had names Serendine his king candidate, and after she died, Judar had disappeared for a long time. And when he came back, he had forgotten about the princess of Parthevia. That should have stricken something within him. You don't just forget something like that, not after how proud he had been of her conquering his first self raised dungeon. 

And what had Aladdin said? The thing in Parthevia, he had come to apologize? And taken the beating, probably silent, without defending himself. He had a Borg, if Judar had wanted to, Sinbad would never have been able to hit him. Why didn't Sinbad remember..? Did his friends remember? Maybe, maybe not. Rurumu had died then, so most of his comrades had been drunk. Agh shit, he really had no way to tell if Aladdin was telling the truth...

He blinked as his feet started to feel cold and wet, and he lowered his gaze, to find himself ankle high in the gardens pond. He hummed, not really surprised at that, and took steps back, seating himself against the tree next to the pond. He stared up through the branches and the green, lush leaves, not caring that it was darkening rapidly around him.

Anyways, Sinbad couldn't forgive what had been done back then, but maybe, blaming Judar wasn't right. He knew nothing, and from the way he had screamed himself hoarse, and how he had cried and wailed... the way he had begged not to be touched... It was easy to imagine some of the things that had been done to him. 

Sinbad sighed, raking a hand trough his hair. 

Was Aladdin right..? Was he this selfish? 

... Maybe he was. He had become something he had always loathed, going to such lengths to protect what he had build, that he disgusted himself at times, whenever he had the time to think about it. It was true. 

Sinbad had become a despicable man. But it seemed like he was the sole light to Judar, however weird it sounded. 

" Isn't this usually the moment you start to drink, my king?" a voice startled him from his thoughts, and Sinbad blinked up at his long time friend, not really surprised to see Ja'far here. 

" Sadly, I seem to have forgotten my wine in my room today."

" Oh how rare for you. How about we go and get it then, your majesty?" Ja'far gave an amused smile, chuckling as Sinbad gave a airy laugh and got up. 

Together they made their way to the kings chambers, where they seated themselves and Sinbad went to get the Sindrian wine from under his bed.

Pouring them both a glass, Sinbad sunk down on the couch, sighing heavily. 

For a while, they stayed silent. It was the former assassin that spoke up first into the silence.

" You know, he did save all of us. That Judar, I mean." 

Sinbad nodded. " So he did, it seems."

" More than that, he made it possible to destroy Al-Tharmen, you know."

" Apparently." the king agreed, although reluctantly. 

" On cost of his own life, almost. And he did save both newborns, and the little girl." 

" Ja'far, what are you trying to pit at?"

" You don't get it?"

" No, I don't! Lately I don't get anything! I'm tired. Just tell me what you think I should do."

" I wouldn't dare to tell you what to do, my king. But as a friend and advisor, I have to say, that maybe you were right all those years ago."

" Oh, that's a rare thing for you to say, my friend."

" It is, and that's why I have to point out, that you should listen to what your heart tells you this time. I mean, you always do this and never listen to me anyways, but this one time, I approve of it, you know."

" I wish I knew what my heart wants, Ja'far..." Sinbad murmured, staring into the red liquid.

Ja'far raised an eyebrow, but just smiled knowingly.

" You do already know, don't you? You wouldn't be this worried if you really hated him, and neither would you be so worried. You wouldn't stop seeing women at night, and you wouldn't try to distract yourself with paperwork. Sin, it's obvious that you care for him in a way. You always have, and you know that." Ja'far heaved a sigh. " I don't particularly like him. I can't stand his demeanour, but he's been living in Sindria for that month without stirring up trouble. He's different now, I think."

" So you're telling me I should give him a chance?" Sinbad grimaced.

" No, Sin. I'm telling you to give yourself a chance. A chance to do what you've wanted to do for years. And isn't that more or less to save that boy?"

"... Maybe. You might be right, who knows." the king hummed. 

" The only thing I know is, that I pleaded for him to stay alive on the battlefield... And when I stabbed him with Baal I... my head went blank. I felt so helpless when he was in my arms... And when that thunder fell down...." he struggled for words.

He had felt that it was Judars magic. And instead of being terrified - what would have been the appropriate reaction, considering the massive destruction the spell had caused - he had felt safe and sound, and relieved to find that Judar was still alive.

" There you have your answer." Ja'far stood up, placing the untouched glass down. He placed a pale hand on his kings shoulder, before leaving the room.

Sinbad stayed back, kneading the back of his nose.

" Just why have you chosen me, Judar...?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guy's, this chapter is about 1k words longer than the fucking rest. And this ain't even half of the chapter planning.  
> Why am I so BAD at chapter planning !? D:  
> Anyways... I apologize for sending Judar through hell. ( But tust me, I've still had worse ideas for him that I didn't use in the end!)  
> It won't stay like this. I promise things will brighten up! Things left unclear will also be explained in the future!
> 
> So, please R&R, because all thos comments keep me going!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > **_" I dont sleep._ **   
>  **_My mind has the scary capability to be dark and demented."_ **
>> 
>> **_" You are afraid of your dreams?"_ **
>> 
>> **_" Yes...," he said quietly._ **   
>  _\- Anonymos_

" Are you sure you want to do this, uncle Sinbad?" Aladdin asked, his staff tightly in his hands. He stared up at the king, ignoring all the other generals, sending only one short, worried look towards Alibaba. " You realize that, while I can take you there, this will have a big impact on your Rukh. I don't think this is a good idea, to be honest..."

" No, it's ok. It' not the first time I've had a fight of wills. Though, the first time I lost pretty badly.." he hummed, remembering his fight against Serendine. 

" Sinbad, I think you should take his concern seriously." Ja'far said, and Alibaba nodded, adding,

" It's hard not to sympathize with someone else's Rukh. I was taken over once. I wouldn't want you to experience the same."

" I think Judar would talk to me. " The king instead said, firmly looking at Aladdin.

" You told me I was wrong. And you were right. I thought about this; why I want him alive. And I came to realize, that I want his power." he said. Might as well be honest. 

" Not for Sindria. Not for my friends. But for myself. I want to see what he can do. But together with me. I don't think Judar is evil. And if you are right, and I am his chosen king, he will feel obliged to listen to me. And when he does, I will offer him a place at my side. I don't want Yunan or Titus, nor do I want you as my Magi. It has to be him." he said.

" Why." was all Aladdin asked. 

" Because I want to get to know him for who he is. Not for who he was as a part of Al-Tharmen. I remember I once told him I would give him a chance if he ever parted ways with them. Here I am, but he is not. I want to help him. Help him find himself." 

Aladdin stayed silent for a whole long five minutes, before he finally nodded. " Fine. But I'll warn you, Judar's mind might be... different. He is a Magi, so he will probably realize what we're doing. I don't know what he will do. You aren't a magician so you can't protect yourself. Your consciousness might die. Are you still willing?"

Without missing a heartbeat, Sinbad said " Yes." with a firm and strong voice. So that was it. It was decided. Aladdin felt his insides churn, and he knew Judar suspected something, but he'd do it. Seeing Sinbads determined face and his gaze, he was at least a bit reassured. 

He looked at Alibaba and Mor, nodding. " I will see you guys later." he said, raising his staff.

" You better get through to him, uncle.." he said, before shouting " Solomons Wisdom!"

The feeling of suction, of leaving his body in a sense, was very difficult to describe. Sinbad had no words for it, and he knew no matter how much he would learn, he would never be able to place words for this strange feeling. At first everything was white, and cozy, but that soon turned around.

It was black, and when he actually noticed something again, he was more or less drowning in something. He gasped for air, bubbles leaving his mouth, and he struggled to get to the surface. He couldn't see anything, and he feared he wouldn't break through in time. Just in that moment, his head came out and he gasped for much needed air. Aladdin came up next to him, breathing heavily.

Sinbad needed a minute, before he pulled himself out and to the side. There suddenly was some dim light here, and the king realized as he looked around, that he knew the scenery very well. It was Parthevia as it had been years ago, while the attack took place. He chocked as the smell of burned corpses entered his nose, and even more as he registered the thick metallic taste on his tongue. 

He pressed a hand over his mouth, fighting against the sick feeling in his stomach, only to notice he was drenched in blood. Eyes wide, he stared at the river as Aladdin pulled out - it was a river made of blood.

" Is this...?"

" This is the deeper part of his mind. Where he confined himself in. It's the massacre of Parthevia..." the Magi nodded, wrung out his clothes and hair, and took a look around. He was calm, because he had come to a close with Judars memories. These weren't his, and if he just kept reminding himself, he'd be fine.

" He confines HIMSELF here in this hell? Why would he?!" Sinbad shuddered.

" Because he can't forgive himself." a voice chimed up. The two intruders looked up above them, finding a strangely familiar, but different person floating above them. 

" Judar..?" Sin asked, but the other tilted his head slightly.

" Do I look like Judar to you?" he asked. Sinbad looked the figure up and down. It was the same slender body, but with completely white skin, hair, and even Eyelashes. Only his eyes were the usual red, though maybe they seemed more gentle than usual. 

" Well... yes." Sin nodded slowly.

" You aren't Judar. Well... not exactly, I guess. Or maybe you are, but I'm not sure..." Aladdin frowned, a little confused. 

The figure chuckled, floating down a little more. He wore the Sindrian attire, reminding a little of Ja'fars clothes, only that the rim wasn't mint green, but a brown-red instead. " Oh I guess it's fine~ You aren't quite wrong either. I am a part of Judar. I am what he refers to as his 'weakness'. He is afraid of me, so he unintentionally cut me off and caged me here. "

" That's strange..." Sinbad said. The white Magi turned to look at him, and smiled knowingly.

" Is it? Aren't you doing the same, my king?" he said. His eyes seemed to see more than Sinbad wanted. " You always play pretend not to hear that small voice in your head. You fight it, fight your own morals. What right do you have to call this strange, when you can't even face your own demons, and instead drown them in alcohol and sex?" his voice was calm, but it hit something deep inside him.

" But it's not normal!" Sinbad insisted. " Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying this is wrong - I'm just saying that Judar is not healthy."

" Oh, and you came here to help him? How foolish my chosen king is." the figure sighed. " You aren't helping. You don't even realize you are judging him. As you are now, you would only hurt him."

" Judging him?"

" Yes. Who defines the norm? Tell me, my king, what is normal and what isn't? Normal are _instincts and urges_. Human behaviour differs. No two persons are the same. Say if there were only two people, and one having two personalities and one only one. Who decides which of them if fine and which one is sick? Tell me, king; If I have ten people and all are different, which one defines the norm? You say this isn't normal. You say, he should be different. You are judgemental."

Something black started flying around, circling Judar, before it rushed into Sinbad, making the man double over. Bits and pieces of thoughts entered his mind, broken parts of conversations and peoples voices, all of them trying to form Judar into something. All of them calling him unnormal and useless, and trying to push their warped ideals on the child. Something in Sinbad turned a tint more black.

" But being different doesn't necessarily mean bad, right?" Aladdin said, interrupting the flood of emotions and suffering entering Sinbads mind.

The white male turned to the other Magi, as if only registering him now. " You... you shouldn't be here. You should not have taken my king here. He might completely fall to the darkness."

" But you want him here, don't you?" Aladdin smiled. " You heard us talking, but you did not try to stop me."

" I didn't, that is true. Judar wishes to be saved, but at the same time, he denies himself any way to redeem. He is afraid. He has always been afraid. It's gotten a lot worse after Ithnan and Marccio died." the male sighed, but agreed.

Aladdin tilted his head. " We fought. He was killed, I'm sorry. But Al-Tharmen was wrong, and you know that."

The white haired magician tilted his head to the other side, and Sinbad registered the same change in him he had made before his words had hit him.

" Wrong? How can you still say that?" he said. " Why is it wrong to fall into depravity? Humans are free to believe in what they want. Humans are free, and thus bound to choose. Whether to accept or to curse their fate. None of either options are technically wrong. You can be black, but still be completely sane. Hakuryuu became black, but that didn't change the fact that he was still kind. Aladdin, you are still mistaken about black and white."

" But falling into the darkness is sad!"

" Not necessarily. Gyokouen was plenty happy, as were the rest of the organization. If you think about it, there is never a wrong or a right; only a clash of wills. And the last one standing is only claimed as right. The victors write the truth. It just so happens that there are more people with white Rukh than people with black Rukh."

" But that doesn't mean that black is wrong..." Aladdin concluded, thinking about this. " Even before, when I met Miss Dunya and also with Cassim, I thought that it was understandable that they cursed their fate. But it was so sad... "

" Sadness is necessary. It is a human emotion, just like hatred and love, regret and fear, longing and lust. Love is generally good, but it can turn out to be bad. To hurt you, or to hurt other people. Some people turn pretty possessive. Then it is seen as bad."

" So, what you are trying to say is... not to judge Judar, as everything is always just relative?" Sin carefully asked.

" Oh, please be my guest and do so. I'm just saying, you need to think before you talk. The other you will meet isn't as nice as me. He doesn't work with reason, but on conditioned actions and instinct. He's afraid, like a wounded, caged animal." he looked at the younger magician. 

" You need to be careful. He has taken a liking to you. Don't make him hurt you. It would make it worse."

" What about me?" Sin asked.

" You won't go yet. You don't understand Judar enough. You will first have to see." 

" See...?"

" A bit of his past, of course. He may be afraid of you falling to the darkness, but I couldn't care less. So you will learn." 

As Aladdin was shoved back into the river of blood, the figure dissolved into a swarm of black Rukh, and rushed into Sinbad, overwhelming him.

Maybe it was an eternity, maybe just a split second. When Sinbad had his senses again, he felt tears streaking down his cheeks, and the black Rukh in him were in uproar, multiplying slowly but surely. He could feel it - the darkness eating away at him. 

He felt awful... the memories weren't more than a whisper, but the feelings were strong, and still fresh like a wound he had received in the last minute. 

Sinbad swallowed dry, panting a bit, before he looked up again, at the white haired version of the Magi. It stood there lie it hadn't dissolved, or moved an inch." Tell me something please. You referred to yourself as his 'weakness'. In what way are you a weakness?"

The male smiled, before lowering himself until his feet touched the ground, and he kneeled down on one knee in front of his chosen king, placing one hand over his heart, looking up.

" I am the part that isn't afraid to show what I feel. When I am hurt, I cry. If I feel sad, I wail. If I am happy, I laugh. If I am lonely, I will search for company. Judar has been raised in a warped way, and he himself went ahead and tried to kill his thought and reason at the root. That was the only way for him to survive. Any time he questioned something, he'd end up hurt, mentally or physically. A big part of me is just his emotions and his reason. What's left is his instincts to survive, and the crass front he puts up not to get hurt. My king, I realize I have no right to ask this of you, but now that you are here, I beg of you; please save the other me. The part you see right now, this me, I only survived because of the sole thought that there is someone out there that is pure and white like the first snow of the year. You kept me alive... you are the only one that can make me whole again." 

The sincere words and the pain obvious in those red eyes struck a chord deep inside Sinbad, and the intruder knelled down in front of the figure, reaching for a delicate hand, receiving a somewhat shocked looked from the Magi.

" I see. I guess, I am starting to understand a little. I won't judge anymore. I promise you. You are a part of him, so you too will be my Magi in the future, won't you?" Sin asked, smiling slightly, showing hope. 

Those pale lips trembled a bit, but soon formed into a wry smile, and Judar nodded with closed eyes, as a few tears rolled down his cheek. He lowered his head in a bow. " Yes... yes, anytime you want me, I will be there. I-I... I know you can't forgive me, and that's fine but... Thank you... Please, save me... I'm sick of this place, of the memories, of the pain and suffering. You are my light... please give me a reason to live. Because I don't know what else to live for, if not for my king who wants me..."

Sins smile widened a bit, as he stretched a hand and ruffled through the white hair. " Well, there's Mirtha, and Jelez, and Shilya, you know. And Aladdin, too. Even Ja'far asked me to get your sorry ass back, so I guess I have no choice but to drag you out of here, right~?" he chuckled. " Let's go. I still have to go see the rest of you. All of you needs to be by my side." 

"Yes, my king.." Judar smiled, and with that, he closed his eyes once more. Their surroundings became blurry, and Sinbad looked around. He flinched as the Judar in front of him dissolved into a mass of Rukh. Most of them black, although he could indeed make out a flock of white in between them. They swarmed around him, sometimes touching his skin, each leaving a whisper of comfort and affection behind, making his skin tingle and his stomach flutter. Honest Judar really was too cute.

The Rukh obscuring his vision dispersed into every direction, leaving him alone in a dark void. He was floating at first, until his feet touched the ground. It was completely silent here, and the silence seemed to burst his eardrums. It smelled like blood and fear around him. He turned around in a circle, but everything looked the same - complete darkness. 

Deciding to look around closer, he stepped forward. It seemed to go on forever until he found something finally. But it wasn't Judar, it was Aladdin. The young Magi stood there in the emptiness, clutching his staff in front of his chest like it was the only thing that could save him. Sin went up to him, placing a hand on the young magicians shoulders. Aladdin flinched heavily and looked about ready to bolt away until he looked up, and breathed out in relief. 

" Uncle Sin... I was worried..! Are you alright?"

" Yes, I'm fine. What about you? You look like you've seen a ghost or something like that.." he hummed in worry. Aladdin swallowed.

" I'm ok. I can't advance further. Every time I try to talk to him, he... I can't. You have to try."

"... ok. Head up, Aladdin. It'll work out, you'll see." he smiled. Even though Sinbad said that, he was restless. Seeing Aladdin pale like this gave him an idea that the other part of Judar was worse. He gave the young boys shoulder an encouraging squeeze, before he continued his way into the darkness. 

His steps never echoed in here. It stayed black around him, and as he looked back, Aladdins figure had disappeared. He wondered how this empty and dark space reflected Judars state of mind. 

However, he stopped completely in his tracks, as he saw the poor Magi. What he saw didn't sit right with him.

Judar had his usual black hair, but it was open and seemed filthy. He only wore a piece of cloth around his small hips - he was about 10 years old, Sin guessed. It was the Age children needed someone the most, he remembered. Judar stared into the empty space around them, his eyes not reflecting anything. 

Sin stopped for a moment. Judar had a whip in one of his tiny hands, and a strong chain in the other hand, leading to a collar around his own neck. Sinbad frowned. A whip? Here was nobody he could hit with it, besides himself. His gaze wandered to Judars back. Wet red glistened through the black strands of hair.

Oh.

So, he didn't need someone to hit. He hit himself. And holding the leash to his own collar... No doubt that this was the part Judar showed to other people. Unreasonable and under lock and key, restricted by his own warped mind. Sin took a deep breath, before he stepped up until he was in the field of vision of the very young Judar. 

The child looked up at him, eyes big. This near, Sin could make out the remains of kohl streaks down his cheeks - remains from many tears. 

" You look a little lost." he tried.

" You look old. Get away from me, I don't need another geezer around me." the small boy put out his tongue at him, and Sinbad flinched, pouting. He pushed his hands onto his hips.

" Old? Now, that's mean. I'm no geezer, though. I'm a king."

" Huh? No waaay~" 

" Why don't you believe me?" Sinbad tilted his head.

The boy pointed at him with the whip. " But your Rukh tells me you don't believe your own words. That means you aren't a true king." 

Sinbad frowned. His Rukh? But he didn't lie! He was a King! He ruled Sindria! And he was a pretty good King, he had to point out. His people loved him!

" But I _am_ a king. I promise. I am ruling Sindria, a country I established myself." he said.

The boy blinked up at him. " But you don't think that really, do you?" he said. " I'm not talking to someone like you who can't make up his mind. Stupid King."

 _Ah, back to that stupid nickname..._ Sin thought. So that's why Judar kept calling him that for years. Sinbad sighed, and sat down right won spot. Judar looked at him in confusion.

" Why are you sitting down?"

" I'm not leaving here without you." Sin decided, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

" And if I decide to use my whip against you?"

" Be my guest. I've endured pain, like you did. I was a slave back in the days. A few whippings from a child won't do much for me." he shrugged his shoulders.

Judar hummed. " I guessed as much. The pain from a whip just isn't enough. It doesn't even sting anymore." he confessed, looking a bit insecure. " I don't know what to do anymore. I'm supposed to hit myself, but it doesn't hurt anymore, so I stopped. I need to go back, so they make it more painful." 

" Go back to where? Al-Tharmen?"

Judar flinched, holding the chain in a stronger grip. " No. Yes..? Anyways, they wouldn't want me talking to you. So you need to leave."

" I'm not leaving, I'm telling you. Do you really want to go back to them?"

" Yes." the boy nodded, but a tear escaped his eyes. He didn't seem to register it though.

" You're a liar."

" And so are you." he shot back.

" Assuming I start telling the truth, will you be honest with yourself?"

" No"

" Why?"

" Being honest is painful. Getting what I want is impossible. I am to stay like this. I'm on a leash, see?"

Sinbad frowned, a little bit in pity as the boy showed him the chain.

" Yes, but you're holding it yourself. You have no one here who can tell you what to do. You don't need to stay like this."

" That's not true." the boy insisted. " Shut up. I can't get away. When I try, they... nevermind."

" They do bad things to you?"

" No! Shut up." he growled, raising the whip and swinging it with force, to hit his own back. Sinbad jumped up and stepped towards him, holding his small wrist. 

" Let go!"

" No! Stop hitting yourself!"

" I'm supposed to do this whenever I think about going away or being free! **Don't touch me you geezer!** " the child screamed, struggling to get out of Sinbads grip. The king just went ahead and wrapped his arms around him.

" I am not going to idly sit by and watch you hurt yourself!"

" The geezers told me to do this! You're not going to stop me!"

" I am, are you blind!?" 

They kept struggling, with Judar punching and kicking, and pushing his elbows into Sinbads ribs. The man groaned a bit, but refused to back down. 

" Are the geezers something like a master to you?! You're acting difficult, be a good child and stop struggling!"

"Shut up!"

Sinbad growled, went for the chain, and literally ripped it out of the small hands, before he tugged at it, forcing Judar to strain his neck and tilt his head back until he could look up to Sin, who stood behind him.

" I have the chains now! I'm your new master, so shut up and stop fighting me!" he shouted. 

Judar stopped immediately, but listened, although he was grimacing. " You don't make sense!"

" Well, you don't make sense either, so that makes two of us. Will you stay calm if I let go now?"

"... yes. You have the chain, so you are my master, I guess." the boy sighed, evading Sins intense gaze.

Sinbad slowly let go, wary if Judar really listened. Nothing happened though, and the king sighed in relief.

" So, what am I supposed to do now?"

" How about, stopping to shut out your other half?" he suggested, but as Judar stiffened, he held up his hands. " It would be nice if you could, but I understand if you can't do it so suddenly."

" No.. it was an order, so -"

" You don't _need_ to listen to me, you know?"

" But you said you're a king... and my new master."

" Yeah, well.. I thought we had already made it clear that I'm a _stupidy_ king." Sin gave a lopsided grin, and Judar frowned.

" You know, you're a genuine weirdo."

" I don't want to hear that from you!" the king slightly snapped, before groaning and massaging his temples.

Judar watched him, before his gaze went to the chain in the adults hand. He hummed, smiling slightly. " But... maybe you aren't a bad king, I guess."

Something warm swelled within Sinbads chest, but he just cracked a slight smile.

" Will you come back to the rest now? You have a family waiting... back home."

" 'Home'?"

Sin smiled. " Yes, home. You'll become my Magi, won't you?" he wrapped his arms around the small figure in front of him, closing his eyes. It stayed silent for a while.

When he opened his eyes again, this time he wasn't surprise to find a grown up Judar in his arms. Those red eyes were cast down, glistening from unshed tears.

" You really are a stupid king... " he said, wrapping his arms around the mauve haired king. Sinbad slightly chuckled.

" I guess~"

" But... I don't dislike you at all.."


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > _**" It's OK if you fall down** _   
>  _**and lose your spark.** _   
>  _**Just make sure that when you get back up** _   
>  _**You rise as the whole damn fire."** _
>> 
>> _\- Collete Werden_   
> 

As he opened his eyes the next time, he blinked against the light invading his eyes, and he groaned lowly. A headache. It was a little bit like his hangovers - just ten times worse, and he lifted his arm to lay it over his eyes, shutting them again.

" King Sinbad! Thank god you're back!" it was Yamuraihas voice that reached him first, but after that a lot of voices rained down on him. He tracked all of them back to his friends and generals, and with a sigh, he placed his arm next to him and forced his eyes open, while pushing himself upright.

" Yeah... I'm back.." he said, blinking a few times, before looking around, into the curious and worried faces around him, all of them also full of hope.

" How do you feel, your majesty?" Ja'far asked, and Sin pondered around that question for a moment, before frowning a little. 

" Not that bad, I guess. I'm confused and... a little bit horrified by what I experienced but... I have been off way worse before." he said. His white haired friend nodded, turned around for a minute, and turned back with a glass of water in his hands, giving it to his king. Sinbad sipped it gratefully, but remembered about Aladdin.

" What about Aladdin? And Judar?" he asked.

" Aladdin hasn't quite returned from... wherever exactly his consciousness went. As has the other Magi." Yamu reported, backing off a little to give a free sight towards him. As Sin saw that, he couldn't help but snort a little.

Young Mirtha had cuddled into Judars side, eyes closed. Though, Sinbad saw her brows furrowed, so she was probably awake. " She came in here some time ago, saying that ' the mister can't sleep without her at his side, because he has horrible nightmares'. Also, apparently, the oracle tends to get violent if he finds her after waking." Yamu smiled slightly. " But, I quote: ' That's fine, because Mirtha is quick enough to dodge by now.'" she chuckled. 

" Is that so?" Sin smiled, looking at the child. 

" Shouldn't we get her away from him then?" Spartos asked, but Sinbad just laughed.

" No. I don't see any reason why, really. They're family now, and I think she knows best if she's able to get away or not." he shrugged his shoulders, and slowly shoved his legs over the beds edge and stood up. For a few seconds, Ja'far supported him to stand, before the adviser took a step back. Sin walked over to Aladdins bed, placing a hand on the blue haired boys forehead. He was pale. If he didn't knew better, or had seen it before, he would have claimed him dead. 

But he couldn't blame him. Judars mind was twisted, dark and uncomfortable. It was just normal that Aladdin was a bit more taken by it. He had seemed very... put out, a while ago. He had probably tried to make Judar think he was free. And Judar probably hat whipped himself, refusing to think about freedom. Aladdin was a nice kid, he just wanted well for Judar.

But Sinbad wasn't as nice. If Judar was afraid of freedom, Sinbad would hold him on a leash. If Judar was afraid to think for himself, Sinbad would give him orders. If Judar needed someone to inflict him pain... well, Sin could probably even deal with this. 

He turned around, away from Aladdin, and went to Judar, stroking over that black hair. Judar looked calmer now. 

" If he wakes up, I expect him to be treated with utmost care. He'll be Sindrias Magi after all.... my Magi." Sin said, and his generals grinned, before they bowed.

" Of course, your majesty~" they answered in time. 

" Let them rest now. It's been hard on all three of us." he suggested, and the rest nodded. Slowly but surely, all of them left the room. Stopping in the door, he turned around once more. " Mirtha, if he wakes, please come tell me, ok?" he requested. The girl gave a small nod, still pretending to be asleep, and with an amused smile, the king left the room at last. 

It wasn't until the next day, when Mirtha stumbled into the throne room, holding the bump on her head, that the magician woke. Around the same time, the baby girl, that had been named Shilya, actually cried loudly for the first time since they took in the children. 

" Y-your majesty..!" the black haired girl said in an exited voice. " Mister woke up!" she looked happy, even though the bump must be pretty painful for her. Sinbad smiled happy and nodded.

" I'll be there shortly." 

 

" You need to take it easy!" Alibabas voice reached him, as he was about to open the doors. He smiled slightly, pushing them open, just to have the girl slip away at his side and rush into the room. 

" Mister!" she squealed, and Sinbad chuckled as he saw that she jumped the poor magician. 

" What the - Fuck it, Mirtha! Get off!" 

Ah, somehow he really had missed this, he noticed silently. He stepped into the room almost soundlessly, but of course, Judar and Aladdin noticed him. The black haired magician stopped trying to get the girls arms off his torso, and instead his head shot up, looking at the kind with a kind of frightened expression. 

It was just for a small second, before he carefully schooled it into an annoyed one." Oh look. It's the stupid king." he said, and now even Alibaba and Morgiana looked up. Aladdin smiled up to him.

" Uncle Sinbad!" he greeted. 

" Sinbad." Alibaba and the fanalis nodded. He returned that nod, before he stepped up to the bed, crossing his arms in front of his chest, and smiling down on the Magi.

He didn't notice that Judar was getting extremely uneasy at his closeness, but Mor could smell it. And Aladdin felt it through their bond. 

" So, I see you're back to being a living man, huh?" Sin joked, making Judar slightly cringe.

" Yeah... something along those lines. There were two pests who decided it wasn't my time yet, you see." 

" From stupid king to pest in less than 5 minutes. That's an achievement." Sinbad chuckled. Judars gaze evaded the kings, and instead he stared at the girl clinging to him.

" I told him to take it easy, but there is no use talking to this bullhead." Alibaba grumbled. The blond prince seemed rather at ease around their former enemy - well he had enough time to adapt, Sin guessed. 

" I don't take orders from anyone. Especially from creepy guys!"

" What of me is creepy, you punk!?"

" That attitude of yours! You're... Argh screw you! Hakuryuu was right, your happy-go-lucky front is really pissing me off, too!" he growled.

It fell silent in the room, and Alibaba formed his hands into fists, while Morgiana stared at the floor. Judar stiffened, but pressed his mouth shut.

Only Aladdin continued to smile.

" When will you bring them back?" he simply asked. Judars head shot up, and he stared with wide eyes. Even Sinbad looked at him in confusion. 

" Aladdin.. what do you mean?" Mor asked carefully. 

" Y-yeah... b-bring them back..? But aren't they.. dead?" Alibaba asked, shooting a glance at Judar the Magi couldn't quite decipher.

" Ummm... well, in a sense, I guess?" Aladdin tilted his head. " To be honest, those formulas were a bit too hard for me. But, their Rukh is still here. They haven't returned to the great flow. That's your doing right, Judar?" the young boy smiled brightly.

" Is that true?" the high king questioned, and Judar flinched as all gazes went to him. He felt like a pitch black hole was swallowing right up, until he felt Mirthas arms around his torso tighten a bit, grounding him again. Feeling a little unreal, he slowly, cautiously curled his arms around her, lowering his head. The mass of black hair around him covered his eyes. 

" I...." he stopped right away, not sure how to explain this. " That's not... right. I..I killed them.. with my own hands, I..." he stumbled over his words, his voice barely above a feebly whisper. 

" I guess that's true. " Aladdin hummed, still smiling. Then he pointed at Judars jewellery. " I can see the huge quantity of Magoi you stored in your choker. And it's circulating around your armrests. And, you have Rukh stored in them - black Rukh."

"..." Judar stayed silent, his arms around the girl tightening a little. It took him a while to finally find the courage to speak again. 

" Hakuryuu and Hakuei were my king candidates. I wanted to make Hakuryuu my king. But I can't, it's... impossible to betray my king. It's -"

" I know. It's Magi stuff, you know? Kings and king candidates. But even though, he was important to you, wasn't he? As a friend."

" I don't _need_ friends!" Judar snarled, not looking up. " I'm _different_ from you guys! I'm black! I'm... I'm _better_ than you all! I don't need people around me!" he insisted. 

None of the present people trusted those words, but they decided to stay silent, only smiling inward.

" ... Hakuryuu even became black, in the end. I thought it would feel good. But it didn't. And then I... I understood what Gyokouen... no, **Arba** was doing to stay alive... shedding the bodies and jumping to the next one. I didn't understand, but Hakuryuu did. He said that the witch needed a body, but it had to be connected by blood. So we... we came up with a plan. The witch can't posses Rukh, so we... " he pulled up his shoulders, unconsciously.

Alibaba felt bad for the magician. Right now, he looked really frail. Broken, and lonely. 

" So you killed them. And... stored their Rukh... in your armrests?" the blonde prince asked. Judar flinched again, just barely so, but the four people in the room noticed it. 

Judar didn't respond. He didn't want to respond. He didn't want to think about it. He had done terrible things, going so far to almost _torture_ Hakuei, just so she would become a black vessel. Because Judar was better at controlling black Rukh, and... well, black Rukh didn't return to the flow anyways. It was just a matter of keeping them separated, and their consciousness intact.

" Probably..... I.... no. Not me, but... Aladdin.... maybe.." he attempted to say something, but threw it out the window just a second later. He wasn't nearly good enough right now. He hadn't enough knowledge. Even though he had absorbed parts of the medium back in Magnoshtadt, he didn't have enough time yet to calmly come up with a formula to reconstruct their bodies.

" Maybe together." Sinbad said, and he placed a warm hand on Judars head, ruffling trough the long black silky hair. " If you can't do it alone, do it together. If one Magi can do unimaginable things... think about what you could achieve together!" 

" No. That's not my task..." Aladdin smiled sadly, and Judar nodded. 

" I don't even know if they can be restored in general... They might end up as completely different people... if I am able to give them a body in the first place..." Judar said.

" Why can't you help him, Aladdin?" Mor asked. Maybe she felt that there was a deeper cause, but the young magician only continued his smile. Alibaba didn't like that. Always.. always, when Aladdin had that look, he was distancing himself. Always taking on everything himself! Even though they were friends!

Was this another situation that fell under that reign? How stupid! Why couldn't Aladdin understand, that friends were there to help each other!?

" You can continue to think about it, for now. I think, the most important thing right now, is for Judar to get back on his feet." Sinbad decided, and he looked at his Magi. " You've been out cold for weeks. You need to eat and drink, maybe take a real bath for once. If you're up for it, Mirtha could tell you about what has happened in that time." he offered. 

Judar finally raised his head once more, staring at Sinbad with slightly widened eyes. " What..? You're treating me like..."

" A very honoured guest, and if I remember correctly, you recently agreed to become my Magi, didn't you?" Sinbad smiled. 

Judars heartbeat picked up rapidly as he looked at the mauve haired male. Had he heard right? He was a guest? And... and, he really would be able to be Sinbads Magi..? He had thought that was a dream! 

" So that... that wasn't..."

" It wasn't a dream. I thought you knew when you called Aladdin and me a pest, earlier?"

" No, I... I thought that it felt like you two wouldn't leave me alone, but I thought that was just... "

Sin chuckled, his gaze warming a little. Noticing how Judar grew slightly pink cheeks, he smiled widely. 

" Anyways, I'm sending you some servants to help you. Ah, that's right Aladdin might want to help you, right?"

" Of course!" the boy cheered happily. 

Apparently, that was a sign for the rest to leave. Judar looked down towards the girl, and sighed. He made attempts to pull her up, but failed. He really seemed like a shell of his former self, he noticed with a grimace. Though, Mirtha understood without words, and climbed up herself, wrapping his arms around his neck this time. 

Again, Judar sighed. He spared a glance at Aladdin, but it wasn't like he could keep secrets or a front with him anyways. He was reminded of that every time he saw the white hair.

" Mom is gone now..." she whispered. " Jelez stopped crying just the other day. He misses her. I miss her too. My sister... they say, her name is Shilya." she sniffed. " And that Mister named her, after all. Did you tell mom?"

"... Yeah. You know, your mother was a pretty stupid woman. Even in the face of death, she refused to name her, and pushed that duty on me. I really had no choice." Judar said, sighing and staring at her dark eyes. He could not lie at this honest girl. But he couldn't become her family either-

" Will you become our new mom?"

" I - What!? First of all, I am a man. So _no_ I will not be your mom!" he snarled. She didn't seemed fazed by it, though. 

" King Sinbad said, you're now a part of our family. You're the oldest. So... you are our parent.."

" That would make me the dad, if at all." he grumped. Sinbad had said this? Yeah of course, he had been there. He had heard Ireenas last words. It shouldn't be this surprising. 

" I wouldn't make a good parent, believe me. I won't change diapers, and I'm short tempered. I'd probably hit you, a lot. And I draw trouble to me wherever I go. It's not a wise idea to count on me. "

" I will change their diapers. I... I will do everything that you won't, so please, Mister! Please!" she pleaded, with big round eyes, slightly teary now. 

Judar cursed inwardly, closing his eyes in defeat.

" If you call me dad just once, I'll make you regret it so hard you'll wish you had never saved my live back then."

"... Does that- .. YES! Yes, I understand! Thank you, Mister! Thank you so much!" she cried, burying her face against his neck. 

Judar flinched and grimaced, but didn't really stop her for a few minutes. It was all very weird. From being a pet or the organization, to being a runaway, and finally being the one to strike down that witch. Going from orphan, to... to what?

He certainly didn't feel like a dad now. Nor like an older sibling. He didn't even know what to do from now on, much less what he was supposed to do with... _family_. The warmth leaning against him, the quivering human girl.. a goi brat on top of that.... And two newborns too. 

He really was going to be the worst parent out there, wasn't he....?

" Mirtha, how about letting Judar get some more rest? You can come by later again, ok?" Aladdin said, tilting his head. The girl nodded, her crying calmed down to rare sniffling. Reluctantly, she pulled back from Judar, gave him a bright smile, and hopped from the bed. Once more, she turned around, quickly hugged the black haired male, and rushed out of the room.

"... So, You're goiing to be a father from now on, huh?" Aladdin hummed.

" We are not going to talk about this shit now, shorty." Judar sneered, making the younger magician snicker a little. " You're rotten, did someone ever tell you that?" 

" I think nobody noticed yet. You know, that's also partly your fault anyways. Back then, when our memories... you know?" Aladdin started, and came over to support Judars body as the taller male left his bed. He helped him walk to the connected bathroom and sat him down there, before closing the door. Letting the water enter the huge tub, he continued.

" I get the feeling, my personality changed a little for the worse. I got influenced by your memories a lot, actually. The first half month, I tried to take them in. But I think, you're being influenced by mine also. You're much calmer, and almost _tame_ " 

" Urg, I don't want to hear that. Shut up, squirt."

" No way, this is too much fun!" Aladdin laughed. He threw a gaze towards Judar, smiling slightly.

He was pale, and he was thin. But seeing him with at least a little bit of fight, awake and alive, was unmistakeably better that just seeing the body lying beneath him, as he wiped him down so many times. 

" Your thought are clear as day. Do you do this on purpose?" Judar grimaced, and Aladdin laughed again as the older Magi averted his gaze. 

" Not really~ Come on, let's get you onto the warm water now!"


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> >   
>  **_" In every Angel, a Demon hides,  
>  And in every Demon, an Angel strides."_ **
>> 
>> _\- R. Queen_   
> 

Sinbad smiled slightly, as he watched the scene unfold before him. 

" No."

" But.. but Judar!"

" I'm saying no, and that's it."

" But this isn't even fair!" Mirtha stomped her little feet on the floor, and Judar narrowed his red eyes. He pushed his hands on his hips, slightly bending down towards the girl. She quickly backed up, probably to evade a very possible hit, but the Magi just stared her down. 

" I keep telling you, that you being there while two Magi's train, is not an option. You can watch from the sidelines. Isn't that enough?"

" No! I want to be by your side! I don't know what will happen if I'm not with you!" she protested, dark eyes widened and visible fear in them. " When you fight with Yamu-san or Aladdin, I always.. it reminds me of that day..." she stumbled over her words. 

Judar raised his hand, and Mirtha pressed her eyes shut and pulled her shoulders up a little. Judar just sighed, ruffling her black mess of a hair. " Well, of course you'd be reminded. You need to get over it. I use magic, because without that, I can't even protect myself. Much less you or the siblings."

" But.. It's only been a few month.. how can I get over it?"

" You will, in time. Just stop clinging on me."

" But ..-" Mirtha was interrupted, as Shilya's cry disturbed the peace, and Judar groaned. He massaged the back of his nose, turning around to the cradle. He wasn't surprised to find his King there, trying to calm the baby girl down. 

It was still weird to call him his King... but really, that was how things were right now. " I thought I told you that she can't stand you." he said, and Sinbad gave a wry chuckle, backing off.

Judar sighed, walking over, and taking the girl out and on his arms. She instantly stopped crying, and just seconds after, made happy gurgling sounds. 

" Well, I just thought..." Sin started, but sighed, and shook his head. " She's such a cute baby, I just wanted to sneak a look.." he sighed again. " Why does she hate me that much?" 

Judar tried not to roll his eyes at the whiney tune. He turned around to the mauve haired male, and stepped aside. " Here, you take Jelez out. " he simply said. " We can hand them over to Mor and Alibaba, since they're leaving soon."

" You ignored my question." Sin grimaced, but went ahead and picked the second baby up. Jelez was a much more easy child - he only cried if something was wrong. He was the opposite to his sister, Shilya, who didn't want anyone near her, aside from the black haired Magi. Even Mirtha was just tolerated. Sin thought that it probably had reasons, something with magic or such, but Judar never answered him whenever he asked. 

" Come on Mirtha, we're going to the brute and the creep." the magician hummed, and Mirtha nodded, trailing after the two males. It was an odd picture. It's been 3 month since Judar woke up, and for the most time, he hadn't been able to do much. He simply slept a lot, rested, and tried to regain his strength. It wasn't easy, though, since he was still a spoiled man. He refused to eat most of what he was offered. It wasn't until Sinbad told everyone that Judar didn't eat meat, that his diet had been changed into more of fish, fruits and vegetables. That did seem to help, so while Judar was still a picky eater, at least he finished most of his meals. 2 month after waking up again, he started basic training, like going on runs and a little strength training. Aladdin accompanied him, and it was amusing to see that the blue haired magician had by far a better condition than Sindrias new Magi. Needles to say that Judar was more than pissed off at that fact and had upped his training to the point where one of the General generally had to pick him off the floor and throw him into bed in the evening. None of them really cared, most found it quite amusing. 

" Why do you call him creep, Judar?" Mirtha asked, and Sinbad would confess, he was equally curious to the answer of that question. 

" Because that dumb prince is an enigma, and not in the sense that the stupid King is." Judar said, red eyes seemingly darker. " Sinbad is someone that knows of the darkness in himself and embraces it. Everyone, every single living being is in scale with white and black. Some tip over to the darkness, most however don't. It's undeniable that the stronger the person, the stronger his darker side. You don't get powerful without doing things that shouldn't be mentioned to anyone." he said, shooting a glance at Sinbad. Both of them could vouch that this statement was true. By the flicker of guilt in those golden eyes, Sin could feel Judars words, and so the magician turned back his gaze to the front, so he wouldn't accidentally stumble on the marble floor. " Alibaba however... it's as if there isn't a shred of darkness in him. If, say, people are made out of 100 Rukh birds, I'd be probably completely black. Most normal humans would be around 20 black birds, the rest white. Good people, genuinely good people, would be at 15, maybe 13 black birds. But the creep.... is by less than 3 birds, at most. That isn't healthy in my eyes." the last sentence was whispered. " Of course, those who haven't fallen never show any signs of that darkness in their rukh. But a Magi like me can still feel their tendencies. That's why I don't understand how the shorty could chose somebody like that as a king. It is true that so much white is a source of power, though..." he stopped. Though, id Alibabas scale ever tipped completely over to the black side, he'd be a complete nightmare, and Judar wasn't sure if Sinbad could take him on. In Judars eyes, Alibaba was something like a ticking time bomb, and he'd rather not see the fuse lit.

" I see. That makes sense, however, I think you're worrying too much. Alibaba seems more than stable to me, especially with Aladdin and Mor at his side." Sinbad hummed, raising his other hand to stop Jelez from pulling his earrings too much. 

Judar refrained from mentioning that it wasn't exactly sure for Aladdin to stay. The smaller Magi was just as enigmatic as his chosen King. Something else entirely, and he simply hummed. Well, it wasn't as if Judar and Sinbad where that much different in the aspect of uniqueness. A fallen Magi and a half fallen King with too much magoi and too much ambition than it was healthy. He still didn't quite understand how Sinbad could take him in. 

A hand brushing against his own startled him out of his increasingly darkening thoughts, and he stared at Sinbad who had caught up. He wasn't walking a step behind the magician now, but right next to him. The brush had been the Kings hand against his own. It wasn't enough touch to scare Judar, just enough to snap him out of his thought.

Just enough to feel the warmth of Sinbads skin, and Judar quickly turned his gaze to the front again. " So... are you free tomorrow evening?" Sinbad asked, as casually as he managed. It pulled a sneer from Judar nonetheless.

" I guess. It's not like I have much to do, aside from getting myself back together from this pitiful condition I'm in." he answered. Sinbad gave a small. 

" Well, you look much better. You are finally starting to gain a bit weight again."

" I never weight much."

" But you had flesh on your bones, you know? You had a fine figure. I really hope you will go back to your former self."

" Bet you wish I'd blush right now, huh?" Judar sneered, but Sinbad grinned.

" Actually, I can't even say anything against that." he confessed.

Sins words made the magicians head shoot around to stare at him, and the black haired male stumbled in his steps. " Wha- Are you resorting to flirt with your enemy now? How sex deprived are you, stupid king?" he refused to acknowledge the slight flutter of his heart, and covered that up with a grimace, as he caught up next to the taller male. His steps faltered as Sinbad suddenly stopped to whip around towards his Magi.

" You forget that we aren't enemies anymore, Judar." he smiled, and Judar could see the satisfaction in those amber eyes at the truth of those words. The black haired male had also stopped, rocking Shilya on his hip in a gesture of absentmindedness, and stared up at his King.

It was such a weird thought - his King. Truly, Judar was Sinbads, Sindrias Magi now, and id would become official in about a month or two. That would probably put the end on the war with Kou. 

" Besides," Sinbad continued, " I'm not really sex deprived - I'm simply interested in someone special right now, and that's my way of showing that." Amusement was clearly visible in the high kings features as he watched the tiniest of blushes spread on Judars pale cheeks, before the smaller male evaded his gaze, snorted, and resumed his walk. 

" I don't know what you're talking about!" he decided briskly, his voice loud to overshadow his embarrassment.

" Hey now! How rude! And after I'm even helping you take care of your children!" Sinbad laughed and caught up once more. Both of them had somehow forgotten Mirtha trailing behind them, before she posed a question.

" Judar? What does Sex deprived mean?" she hummed, in obvious confusion. Both adults stopped, once more, in their way, to turn and look at the innocent young girl. For a moment, they just blinked, staring at her. Sinbads smile had frozen in place, but it became stressed as he could practically feel the seething rage build up around his Magi. Sinbad was sure, one way or the other, Judar would accuse him of the fault for this conversation.

" Mirtha..." Judar started, his voice low, venom clearly audible. Sinbad would have to congratulate the girl later for not even flinching, because he himself certainly did. " We are NOT talking about sex until you're older. A LOT older. You hear me? And now get your feet back to walking, Aladdin and Titus aren't going to wait the whole day." 

" Wait, Titus is here?" Sinbad perked up, as they picked up their walk, passing guards and maids, and finally made they way out of the palace towards the training field.

" Well, if it comes down to it, I'm bad at holding back, and Aladdin is bad at aiming, so he insisted we needed someone to look out for the surroundings and the bystanders." 

" Can't really argue that..." the king hummed.

As they reached their destination, some of the generals were already present, such as Drakon, Yamuraiha, Hinahoho and Pisti. Judar swallowed dryly as he met Hinahohos gaze for a split second, before he went straight up towards Drakon. The reptilian man raised an eyebrow, before he grimaced in panic as Judar shoved Shylia into his scaly arms. " Wait, Judar, this isn't a smart idea!" he protested instantly.

Judar simply took a step back, observing the tiny bundle in the generals arms. She was quiet and seemes plenty satisfied, so he hummed. " She likes you. Good. At least more person I can push her onto when I'm fed up with her." he simply smiled evil. " Deal with it, reptile. She won't let Sinbad so much as touch her, I can't train with her on my arms."

" Give her to Hinahoho then! He raised children!"

" I dare you to test it out. Go ahead." he offered nonchalantly. Drakons gaze shifted to the Immchuk, and all three of them stared at the child. No one of the two moved, so Judar groaned. " Just hand her over already, you'll see what happens." he encouraged. Of course he was... a little afraid of the Immchuk. He knew all too well that it was his fault the man's wife had died, left behind with children to raise on his own. But that was exactly the reason why he was still alright with the giant man taking the infant. Hinahoho would never harm the child, as far as Judar could judge. Well, not that he had ever been a good judge of character...

He watched as Drakon turned to his friend, but as soon as he made the first attempts to give the small living being away, the baby squirmed in his arms and made low, dissatisfied noises. They hesitated, but after a moment, Drakon finally handed her over. It was really a bad idea. Once she was on the other mans arms, she bawled her eyes out, cried loudly and squirmed even more. She was quickly handed back to the reptile. Silence took over them, Hinahoho looked a little hurt, and Drakon obviously had no idea what to do with such a small body in his arms, and he looked at Judar. " WHat... am I supposed to do with her?"

" Oh I don't know. Mirtha usually takes care of her most of the time, tells me how to handle her. At most, I carry her around some, or calm her down, after a certain stupid king made her cry for the umpteenth time. So, you have to ask her." he simply said, not batting an eyelash at the pout he received from Sinbad next to him, or the accusing gaze from Pisti. He had said, from the very beginning, he wouldn't change diapers or shit. Mirtha had agreed. This was an internal arrangement, only disturbed when Sinbad insisted on helping take care of the children. 

" Oh... " was all Drakon said to that, his gaze going for the oldest daughter, that was officially Judars by now. " Well... I guess you'd tell me if I do something wrong, huh.........?"

The magician decided to leave them standing, turning to Yamuraiha, stretching his hand towards her, demanding. She sighed, handing him a staff. It wasn't her own, it was a special one. It was longer than Judar, out of dark cherry wood. The wood was curled by vines of gold, some small bells hanging around the top. The tip was a ruby diamond, embedded and surrounded by golden leaves that were formed like his favourite peach leaves. Judar stared at the wand with wide eyes.

" .. That's not the one I've been having the last two weeks, Yamu."

" That's right. This is actually a gift from me. Well, us, to be more precise." Judar turned his head to stare at the Immchuk that had spoken. 

"... You're kidding."

" Actually, I'm not."

" No. No, this is.. this is impossible. This doesn't make sense. You're supposed to hate me!" he pointed out, his face showing confusion, maybe a tint of fear, but overall he simply didn't know how to deal with this. He noticed that this was the first time he actually stopped to look at the giant, and the resentment in his eyes, better said, the lack of the resentment, made him take a step back. 

" Why would I...?" the Immchuk was confused now, but he didn't speak the sentence completely, before Judar blurted out his thoughts.

" No, no I'm certain you're supposed to hate me. In fact, all of you should hate me! I hurt all of you, I made all of you suffer, and I was the reason so many died! Even Your wife!" Judar rushed out, suddenly pale again. Fear entered his eyes as he understood what he had just said. The rest fell silent, and Judar lowered his hear, letting his hair cover his eyes. Now it was out. The thoughts he had been carrying for the past three month, since waking up. He just couldn't deal with this, so he made another step back, before his wrist was caught. 

Hinahoho had stepped up, making him stay, not giving him a chance to flee. In silence, he took the staff from Yamuraiha, and gently pushed it into the magicians hand. The smaller male twitched, not looking up.

" Look, I understand where those thoughts are coming from. I don't want you to think that we have forgotten what you've done to us in the past. I haven't, and the rest neither. No one will ever." the man said, voice calm. " But we had our fair share of hatred and resentment, and we've moved on from that point on. We know you didn't do it out of a free will, and even though this is not an excuse, it's still a reason not to dwell on the past. We can't change it, and we have to look forward. Besides, you've just recently saved Sindria from a similliar situation and agreed to become a protector of these people here. I think it's time for us to give trust. So you can heal, recover, and maybe someday trust us also." he explained, a small smile tugging at his lips. The rest also shared those thoughts, smiling silently.

Judar didn't raise his head. He couldn't understand, maybe never would, since all he'd ever known were hate, resentment and pain. He knew, if he were in any of their positions, he sure as hell would hate him. His fingers held the staff loosely, before his grip gradually got stronger, until his knuckles and fingers went white with the force.

" Hah! Who would ever trust you guys!" he said, ripping free his hand and stepping further back. There was no bite in his voice, and Sinbad smiled in amusement. " You're just a bunch of... weirdos, too good natured, especially your king! One day, you'll make a wrong decision like this!" he declared loudly, before turning around and stomping off. 

Sinbad chuckled, as did the rest. " Oi, Judar!"

" WHAT!?"

" Don't get beaten by Aladdin!" 

" Sh-shut up stupid king!" with a hurried move of his staff, Judar took off into the air. But not before Sinbad and his friends caught the tip of his ears, in an impossible red shade. 

Judar was simply bad with social interactions, but if they looked close enough, he really was a sheep in wolf's clothes after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Puh, this has taken me much too long!  
> I'm really sorry guys! I don't even have a good apology! It's just... stuff happened, I lost interest in the story, and had to force myself back here. Though I decided not to do the planned second half of the story, I will give this one a clean cut and a happy end with much needed fluff. 
> 
> I hope that's ok, because I know I won't ever finish this story elsewise....
> 
> I hope after coming back here ( I reread everything as not to lose the red string) everything is still fine...


End file.
